


It’s Com-pie-licated

by Anonymous



Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Waitress - Bareilles/Nelson
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Affairs, Cheating, Crack Crossover, Diners, Domestic Violence, Drama, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Implied/Referenced Sex, Jedi Padmé Amidala, Romance, Stress Baking, Tags Contain Spoilers, Teen Pregnancy, The Author Regrets Nothing, Violence against pregnant women
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:13:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 31,797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26176270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Ahsoka Tano works at a diner in the middle levels of Coruscant with her two best friends: Anakin Skywalker, a former slave, and Obi-Wan Kenobi, an orphan of indeterminate origin. She’s responsible for baking all the pastries and it gives her comfort to work with her hands in the warm kitchen, a welcome escape from her abusive boyfriend Habee. But on one fateful morning Ahsoka discovers something that will change her life forever.Or: The crossover that no one asked for. It kind of hit my brain this morning while I was listening to my cleaning playlist and now it exists.
Relationships: Lux Bonteri/Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze, Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker
Comments: 63
Kudos: 99
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Exactly the Same

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahsoka’s day doesn’t exactly go as planned.

Ahsoka peels herself out of the arms of Habee Bam, pulls herself to her feet, then stretches. Her back is sweaty from where it pushed against his chest last night. She frowns and crosses the room, grabbing her clothes from the dresser and checking the chrono on the wall. _Right on time_ , she thinks. After a trip to the ‘fresher she heads to the kitchen, pops a couple of synth-protein bars in her bag and heads for the door. Like every day. 

Not like every day, though. Her stomach churns and aches, bile creeping up the back of her throat as she heads for Dex’s on level 23. She pulls out one of the protein bars and nibbles on it, hoping the nausea is just hunger, but the lab-grown meat makes her feel even worse. _You have to eat some time_. Togrutas are not meant to operate on an empty stomach. Ahsoka forces down the rest of the bar and tells herself she’ll just have to to hold out until luchtime. 

On the way there she passes the metal walls and walkways so familiar to her. Paint of all colors covers duracrete buildings, and speeders zoom by at breakneck speed. Creatures of all shapes, sizes, and colors amble along around her. Ahsoka focuses on her stomach pain and keeping her legs moving. There isn’t time to worry about the murals and traffic that’ll still be there when she gets back. 

She boards the transport and begins to ride it up to the higher levels. Few people are on it at this hour. Well, few for Coruscant, which is like saying ‘cold for a fire’. Few _er_. As it ascends her gut lurches unpleasantly. _I hope I don’t need to see a med-droid about this._ They pass through the large bays, stopping at each one. Finally she climbs off the transport and heads four blocks over to where Dex’s glows with a dim-light. She keys in at the back door and punches her time-chip. 

“Where have you been, Snips?” calls Anakin, coming out of the back room with a cardboard box of napkins. “You’re ten minutes late.” She swings off her bag and hangs it on the hook in the employee only area. Or the employee hallway. It’s little more than a cupboard for them to store their coats. 

“Why are you here so early, Skyguy?” she retorts, tying on an apron, “Your shift doesn’t start for another hour.” He shrugs, putting the box of napkins on the back table and opening it with a swipe of his laser-cutter. 

“Dex wanted me here early to unload the shipment of bantha meat that just came in.” She raises an eyebrow, washing her hands in the kitchen’s sink.

“Bantha meat?” She heads to the rack of clean dishes and pulls out her mixing bowls.

“Apparently it makes better burgers.” There’s another rustle from the back room.

“It does, Anakin.” Obi-Wan exits the back room, carrying a significantly more heavy box of the bantha meant. “Bantha meat has compounds that make it stick together better than regular synth-meat, or any animal blend.” Anakin rolls his eyes and flaps his hands behind the older man’s back. Ahsoka suppresses a giggle, then a heave as the nausea returns with a vengeance. A flash of fear flickers through her. _Habee won’t be happy about this._ Quickly she picks up the bag of flour and begins dumping it into one of the bowls. Then she grabs kessinamon and adds it to the flour in a few carefully measured taps. _Focus on the task at hand._ Add a little powdered regnig, the kind that’s supposed to help when you’re sick, shuura juice will make it sting, just a little, at the back of your throat, can’t forget the sugar. All good cookies have sugar. 

An hour later she has two batches of ‘My Stomach is Killing Me’ cookies cooling on the rack, in addition to some average caf muffins and rolls. She pops two pies in the oven (Corriellian Apple and Shuura Pulp) and leaves them to bake. Then she heads out front to help set up for the day; wiping down booths, setting out little baskets of condiments, and taking in the more obtrusive cleaning droids. Dex’s was a place not _quite_ fancy enough to have robotic waitstaff but not heathen enough to to have organic janitors. Ahsoka folds her arms and takes in the dining area. 

The red booths are clean, the blue floor is mopped. The light strips under the counter are in working order and the stool that only turns 20 degrees either way has been bullied into motion. Dex arrives, giving them their daily this-is-your-job-talk before heading into the back and fireing up the griddle. Obi-Wan heads over to the doors and unlocks them, turning on the sign. Then he stands by his meticulously organized wait-station, preparing for their first few customers.

With a far-too-casual air he checks his personal datapad, a chipped and scratched model from at least three years ago. If Anakin wasn’t so freakishly good at repairing things it would probably be dead by now. The datapad isn’t what sets Ahsoka off, however. What does that is the fact that Obi-Wan is checking it. _At work_. The aggressively straight-laced man would never do such a thing.

“Obi-Wan checking his datapad?” Anakin has clearly noticed, too. He pulls himself up to his full height and plasters an all-too-serious expression on his face. “Whatever’s on this thing is not worth the reprimand you’ll receive for checking on it!” he mimicks, snatching it from the older man’s hands. Ignoring Obi-Wan’s feeble attempts to reclaim it, he lets out a loud gasp. “Snips! Get a load of this!” Ahsoka walks over and peers at the screen of the datapad.

“A _dating_ site?” She bursts into laughter, wincing slightly at the use of her abdominal muscles. _It’s gotta be my period. But I had one... Four? Five? Months ago- so it’s late._ A rush of panic rolls through her but she manages to tamp it down. _It’s fine. All fine. You’re young, things will fluctuate._ “I- uh- wow! Who would’ve suspected that from our _old_ friend?” Obi-Wan blushes, the freckles standing out on his cheeks.

“It’s none of your business!” He snatches the datapad back and slips it into his pocket. “I’m going to delete it anyways. Not really into the, er, ‘casual’ dating scene.” Anakin looks abashed.

“Hey! We were only teasing. I think it’s great that you’re finally putting yourself out there.” He turns to Ahsoka, his grin returning. “If he kicks me out one of these nights, can I crash at your place?” She laughs lightly, but inside panic floods her. _What the hell were you doing hanging off that loser? You ever go near him again and I swear-_ she cuts off the memories. _Not now. Later._ She sighs internally. _I really need to go bake something._

“I don’t think Habee would like that.” She says it lightly but Obi-Wan’s demenour changes.

“Habee doesn’t seem to like much of anything.” he says evenly. Ahsoka sighs and tugs on her apron nervously. “Anyways, I don’t think I’m ready to be kicking anyone out of the apartment, Anakin. Maybe a caf date, or just a holocall.” Anakin rolls his eyes, having missed the tense moment. Before he can respond Dex calls from the kitchen,

“I’m not paying you to stand around discussing your love lives. Work now, chat later!” Dex isn’t an unkind man. He’s just not good at getting his point across without shouting. Ahsoka winces. The vibrations in her montrals seem too loud. She rubs one and snatches a tray from the wait-station, before going behind the counter. For this part of the shift she’ll work back here, then she and Anakin will switch. The counter’s usually busier in the morning, the tables in the afternoon, the booths at dinner. Switching and alternating days helps everyone split the work. Except Obi-Wan. He has to run the host station from start to finish. 

The first customer pushes in through the doors. A rhodian, and pretty hungover by the looks of him. He practically flops onto one of the stools at the counter. _Coffee_ , she notes, _and lots of it_. After that the rush speeds up. Her stomach still lurches every so often, becoming more and more distracting. Suddenly, Anakin pushes his way behind the counter.

“It’s _her_!” he whispers near her left lekku. It’s almost endearing that he thinks she can hear through it. That’s taken care of by sensory organs closer to the bottom of her neck. Today, however, it’s just annoying that her lekku tickles and twitches.

“What do you want me to do about it?” she whispers back, swiping the hungover Rhodian’s tip ( _Half a credit? Seriously?_ ) into her apron. A panicked look comes over his face.

“Switch!” She rolls her eyes and pushes her way back out from behind the counter. The woman he’s referring to is one half of a pair that come in once a week. They’re Jedi, and it’s pretty obvious, but no one ever seems to say anything about it. The woman is a human, with fair skin, dark hair, and dark eyes. Most would say she’s devastatingly gorgeous, but Ahsoka’s not really into humans. The other is a male Kel Dor, his skin leathery and orange. She’s honestly not sure why he comes in because he can’t exactly eat anything, but she assumes it’s for his partner’s sake. 

Moving around the diner is not doing wonders for her stomach but she doesn’t have a lot of options. Going home now is sure to lose her most of the day’s pay, something that will _definitely_ piss off Habee. The scent of food all around her is not helping her out. She tries to pull herself together and slaps a smile on her face as she approaches the table.

“Hello,” she says in her customer voice, “Can I get you-” Suddenly, she stops speaking and one hand flies to her mouth. Quickly she races for the refresher, barely making it in time to reach the toilet. Vomiting is not easy for Togrutas. Some very unpleasant sounds emerge from her gut. She heaves for a few moments and hears the door to the ‘fresher open, a pair of familiar footsteps approaching.

“Snips?” She gets it all out and spits into the bowl. _Am I glad that droids cleaned toilets yesterday or what?_ She presses the button to flush the toilet and the vile substances flow down and away. Now that her stomach’s emptied she’s feeling much better.

“I’m alright.” she calls shakily, emerging from the stall, “I must’ve eaten something weird.” As she stands in front of the sink and splashes her face with water she catches Anakin’s look of concern in the mirror. “What?” He shrugs.

“Nothing. I just... have a weird feeling about this.” Ahsoka rolls her eyes, but on the inside she’s a little nervous. Anakin’s feelings usually turn out to be right.

“Am I dying?” He shakes his head. She washes her hands and dries them in the sonic dryer. “Then we’re good. I’ve got some tables to wait and you have a counter to man. We better get out there before Dex fires us.” Her stomach is definitely feeling better, if not a little sinister. Anakin shakes his head and stands in front of the door. 

“I- uh-” He stammers, placing a palm on his forehead. “Look, Ahsoka... kriff, where’s Obi-Wan when you need him?” As if in answer to his question Obi-Wan pushes through the door, nearly slamming Anakin into the wall.

“Are you okay, Ahsoka? What happened?” She rolls her eyes and leans back against the dinted metal sink.

“This is the _female’s_ refresher.” she says dramatically, trying to push her way past the two men. Anakin has a concerned look on his face. “Will you please move? We’re all going to get fired!”

“First of all, it’s the eleven o’clock slump. The Jedis and a few folks at the counter are the only ones who haven’t been served.” Obi-Wan is calm and reasonable as ever, but a blush is creeping across his face. “Second of all, Anakin and I have noticed that you haven’t really been yourself lately. Neither of us are experts, but, uh...” instead of finishing his sentence he gestures to Anakin. Who’s holding out a small box. _The_ small box.

“Oh, _hell_ no!” she says venomously, “I’m not- There’s no way!” Anakin pushes the box into her hands, seemingly to stunned to speak. Obi-Wan remains virtually unphased.

“I’m assuming you and Habee, ah, sleep together. It’s better to know now than find out later.” Ahsoka sighs. She grabs the box and pops it open. The model is an older one, the kind that reads the hormones in your urine. She gives the two men a look.

“You’re going to be shocked when I tell you about hyperspace.” she jokes. Anakin pushes her towards one of the stalls. Anxiety clenches in her gut. _It’s possible. It’s definitely possible._

“Just take the damn test, Snips.” He puts a comforting hand on her back and she pulls herself together enough to enter one of the small stalls. It takes her a second to get relaxed enough to pee. Every muscle in her body is tense with worry. _I can’t be pregnant! Not possible!_

When she comes out something must look off in her face because Obi-Wan and Anakin share a quick glance. She sets the test down on the counter. It needs processing time according to the instructions. She washes her hands quickly. Obi-Wan is reading the box.

“‘Detects pregnancy in humans, near-humans, and most humanoids.’” he recites, “‘Do not use if test-stick is broken or damaged. Do not insert the test-stick into’-” He’s cut off by a soft slap from Anakin.

“Not the time, Obi-Wan.” Ahsoka is leaning against the wall. The two men gravitate over and stand near her. Anakin puts a hand on her arm. “It’s going to be okay, Snips.” She gives him a shakey smile. Obi-Wan clears his throat.

“I know this isn’t the time,” he says, with a pointed look at Anakin, “but you really shouldn’t be having sex without protection at your age. It leads to situations exactly like these, not to mention you could get a disease or-” This time he’s cut off by a soft beeping. Ahsoka reaches for the test with a trembling hand.

“This is it.” she says softly. Holding her breath, she looks into the little electronic window that holds the fate of her future. “Shit.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re taking some artistic license with Togrutan biology. Funnily enough, no one talks about their reproductive habits.
> 
> So this is a weird fic. Gotta love crack. I know I love writing it. Hope you enjoyed!


	2. A Prayer and a Please

_Pregnant. I’m pregnant._ The words don’t fit together in her mind, the pictures don’t connect. _A baby._ She imagines a baby, a baby with pale skin like Habee’s and blue stripes on the montrals and lekkus like hers. That’s what does it. She hands the test to Anakin and puts her head in her hands. _What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?_ She takes a deep breath in and exhales back out. _Obi-Wan said it’s eleven. I need to go get the pies out of the oven and make new ones._

Baking she can do. It’s what she always does. She’s shocked out of her thoughts by the strong, lean arms of Anakin wrapping themselves around her. Obi-Wan joins in from the other side, and they pause for a moment. Ahsoka lets all the fear and anger float around for a little while. 

“I’m not paying you to have pow-wows in the fresher!” Dex hollers. This startles them and everyone lets go, fixing their hair (or montrals) and uniforms before heading back into the diner. More than a few patrons are staring at them as they exit and Ahsoka can see why. The entire waitstaff rushing into the refresher all at once is quite an occurrence.

She makes a beeline for the kitchen and pulls the two perfectly cooked pies out of the oven. Then she cleans her work area and pulls together everything she thinks she’ll need. There’s the crust, firm and crunchy. The filling is cream and pudding, the top a latticework dusted with sugar. Twenty minutes later there’s a ‘Fall Apart Pie’ being lowered into the oven. Twenty minutes after that it’s followed by ‘Love is Blind’, a beautiful crumb topping, underneath which is a boiling mass of tart berries. Then she wipes down the counters and puts the dishes in the sanitizer before heading back out front to help Anakin with the lunch crowd. 

By the time she makes it out there the whole pregnancy has been shoved firmly to the back of her mind. _Everything will be completely alright_. Anakin catches her eye from behind the counter. _Are you okay?_ he mouths. She nods, turning to serve her first customers, a small group of oddly short men wearing brightly colored tunics. After taking their drink orders she hears a loud shout of ‘waitress!’. Turning around she sees the very last thing she wants to see right now. 

Habee, dressed in his power-plant uniform, is seated at a table in the middle of the room. All the worries that she’s tucked under the crusts of her pies come flooding back as she stares into his face. 

“Habee!” she cries, and not enthusiastically, “What are you doing here? Weren’t you supposed to fly out to the Mids on a cargo trip?” He leans back in his chair, rolling his eyes.

“I decided I didn’t want to go. Too far away from home.” _How the hell do you expect us to make rent if you keep dropping jobs? And now there’s a baby to think about-_ once again, Ahsoka slams the door. _We’re going to pretend that isn’t happening. Worry about it later._ “How are we doing today?” Wordlessly she reaches into her apron pocket and drops the few credits she’s made in tips into his outstretched hand. “This isn’t a lot, Ahsoka.” _I’d like to see you work your ass off for five hours!_ Anger fills her, anger that can’t go anywhere. Arguing with Habee always ends in tears. 

“I’ve been in the back a lot today.” It’s not really a lie. He grabs her wrist. 

“Don’t get mouthy with me! If it wasn’t for me you’d still be living in the bushes on Shili. You should be more grateful.” She swallows the lump of anger in her throat. _At least I was happy there_. Anakin comes over to the table.

“Is there a problem here?” Habee’s eyes narrow. Ahsoka silently prays that Anakin is smart enough to stay out of it. But she knows he won’t.

“What’s it to you?” He sneers. “I’m just having a word with _my_ girl.” Anakin’s expression twitches, but he manages to keep his emotions under control.

“We’re busy with the lunch rush.” He turns to Ahsoka. “We really need all hands on deck.” Habee rolls his eyes and stands up from his seat, slapping a handful of credits down on the table.

“We’ll talk about this later.” he says before walking from the diner. Ahsoka takes the credits and starts towards the register but Anakin stops her.

“You need to start thinking about what you’re going to do about him.” She pulls her arm out of his gentle grip.

“I’m fine. I’ll worry about it later.” Anakin shakes his head and heads back behind the counter.

“He’s not a good guy, Snips. If you need a place to stay, someone can sleep on the couch-” she cuts him off with a wave of her hand.

“I’m going to have a baby, Anakin. I can’t move a baby into your apartment.” She sighs. “I’ll make it work. I always do.” Anakin shakes his head once more.

“We’re always here for you.” She smiles, the simple words making her heart lift.

“I know.”

* * *

Several days later Ahsoka is in the back room with Anakin and Obi-Wan, organizing the supplies shortly after closing time. Obi-Wan has a pained expression on his face, somewhere between caught-in-a-net and night-before-life-day. She pulls a stack of empty boxes across the room and studies him closely. Anakin stops counting meilooruns and walks over to where Obi-Wan is refilling the salt and pepper shakers.

“What’s going on?” he crosses his arms across his chest. Obi-Wan tries to put the lid back on the salt shaker he’s just refilled, but in his distraction he’s trying to jam it on upside down.

“Nothing. What do you-” Ahsoka stacks the last box and heads over.

“You’ve trimmed your beard!” He jumps, hand flying up to the reddish-brown hair growing under his chin. “And you’re acting edgier than a corned Akul. Something is definitely going on.” Now the man is blushing, red spreading over his face.

“It’s none of your business!” Ahsoka rolls her eyes. 

“You cornered me into taking a pregnancy test three days ago.” 

“That was different!” Obi-Wan’s datapad chimes in his pocket. Anakin grabs it and opens the message. His jaw drops open.

“I don’t believe it! He’s got himself a date!” Ahsoka peers over his shoulder and reads the message on the screen. She smiles. 

“Alright, laugh. I’m going out for a caf. With someone.” Anakin punches him on the shoulder. He snatches back the datapad and frowns. “And you need to stop taking things that don’t belong to you.”

“We’re not going to laugh.” Ahsoka says, putting a hand on his other one, “This is great!” Anakin looks the man over with an appraising eye.

“What are you going to wear?” asks Anakin. Obi-Wan shrugs, typing out a reply on his datapd.

“Clothes.” Anakin rolls his eyes.

“You can’t wear any of _your_ stuff. When we get home I’m dressing you up.” He turns to Ahsoka for support. “Want to help, Snips? It’ll be fun!” She glances at the chrono and winces.

“Can’t. I have an appointment at the free clinic on level fifty-seven.” The two men exchange a look.

“Do you need a ride?” She shakes her head, glancing around the supply room. It’s mostly clean, and she should probably get going. 

“I can get there on foot.” Anakin looks like he’s about to argue when his datapad chimes, and he taps on the screen, a little smile coming over his face. _Him, too?_

“Might have to change the makeover plan, Obi. I’ve got some business of my own to attend to.” Now Obi-Wan looks both curious and suspicious.

“What kind of business?” Anakin smiles cryptically.

“You’ll see.” Ahsoka says her goodbyes and heads out the door, swinging her bag over her shoulder. The streets and transports between her and the clinic seem to blur. As she travels a strange bubble of hope blossoms in her stomach. _The test might’ve been wrong. Urine tests aren’t very precise. Maybe I’m not pregnant at after all._ It’s the thought she clings to as she approaches the building.

The free clinics are run by the Coruscanti government to provide lower level citizens with health care. That’s what all the articles say, anyways. The real reason is that it makes the rich people living on the upper levels feel better. This one a large, duracrete building in the middle of level 57. The door in front is transparisteel. Ahsoka takes a deep breath and pulls it open, heading for a large desk across the room. A droid receptionist sits behind it. It asks for her name and birth date, then sends her to sit on one of the many benches in the lobby.

All around the room are creatures of many shapes and sizes. To her left sits a coughing Gotal. To her right is a Twi’lek who looks like they might throw up at any moment. She waits for about half an hour before a medical droid calls her name. She rises, legs stretching, and goes through a door at the back of the room. The droid leads her past several curtained cubicles and into the last one. It has her sit on a table and tells her a doctor will be with her in a moment. She holds her bag on her lap, playing with the strap.

A few minutes later a med-droid rolls in, stopping in front of her. She’s never liked med-droids, and this particular model looks several years out of date. It has one long, spindly pole attaching it to the wheelbase. A large box is the torso, two spindly arms extending from either side, and a slightly smaller box the head. The wheels squeak as it pushes its way across the scuffed blue linoleum.

“Hello,” it says, its voice tinny, “I am unit MD-243. Please give me your name, species, and date of birth.” She does so, and the droid processes for a moment. “What seems to be your problem today?” She finds herself hesitating, as if saying ‘I’m pregnant’ out loud will make it come true.

“I think I might be pregnant.” The droid wheels a little closer and extends an arm towards her.

“This can be determined through a simple blood test. Please hold out your arm.” The droid draws her blood and pulls the small vial back into its bulky torso. Loud whirring noises begin. “This will only take a moment. In the mean time, why don’t you answer a few questions for me?” She nods. “When was the date of your last period?” Ahsoka wracks her brain. _It would’ve been..._

“I’m not sure.” The droid accepts this unblinkingly (well, it doesn’t have eyelids) and presses on, asking her if she’s sexually active, if she’s had any tenderness of the breasts, and a couple of other questions that it probably should’ve asked _before_ the blood test. After a while the loud whirring stops and the medical droid seizes up.

“The results are back. You are definitely pregnant. Congratulations.” It says the whole sentence in its droid monotone, and for a few moments the words don’t reach her. Then they do. _Well. I’m actually pregnant._ A large array of emotions sweep her at this moment, anger and sadness and fear and a little twinge of embarrassment. In her head she composes a pie.

Fold rotten berries into fresh ones, until you can’t tell the difference. Mix with a little sugar and a little salt. Cover with a full crust then shove to the back of the fridge. Mixed bag pie. Tears swim at the edges of her eyes. The medical droid continues to prattle on, with Ahsoka only catching every few words. 

“You should return in one month for a checkup on the fetus.” It pauses for a moment, gears whirring in its brain. “Do you have any questions or concerns?” _What the hell am I going to tell Habee? What the hell am I going to do with a baby?_

“How long has it been?” she asks instead. The droid seems confused because it doesn’t answer for a moment.

“Please clarify your statement.” She sighs, twisting her bag’s strap into knots.

“How far along am I?” A few clicks echo throughout its brain. In the interim she stares at the curtain on the far wall. It’s a charcoal grey, crinkled from age and use.

“Around 14 weeks, or 3.22191 months.” _Three months. I have time. That’s seven to go_. “Do you have any further questions?” 

“No.” The droid opens the curtain and directs her back to the entrance before trundling away to begin another appointment. She sighs, leaning against the nearby wall and closing her eyes. _Shit_. For the three millionth time since leaving she wishes she’d stayed on Shili. Her mother would’ve known what to do. Though if she’d stayed on Shili she wouldn’t be here in the first place. She wouldn’t be wearing a work uniform and a plain metal headband, she’d be wearing Akul teeth and a hunter’s garb. Her bare feet would be running over tough grass and rich soil, not inside shoes and standing on worn tile.

“Are you alright?” The voice startles her from her imagination and back to the real world. Her eyes fly open. Standing in front of her is a human male who looks to be around her age. His hair is brown and well-kempt, his eyes blue. He wears a uniform and he’s carrying a bin full of medical equipment.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” She pulls herself away from the wall and fiddles with her bag, avoiding eye contact. “I’m just... tired.” He nods, pushing a few strands of hair out of his eyes.

“I know the feeling.” He holds out a hand. “I’m Lux Bonteri. I’m volunteering here for school.” Ah. So he’s one of the rich upper levelers. Wistfully she imagines what it would be like to go to school. Ahsoka can read, write, and figure well enough, but once she and Habee left Shili she’d had to abandon education. She takes his hand and shakes it. His grip is strong, his fingers warm.

“Ahsoka Tano. I just got done with an exam.” He gives her a loose grin.

“Well, how did it go?” Her mind blanks. _I found out I’m pregnant with my asshole boyfriend’s child. How’s your day going?_ She adjusts the bag’s strap on her shoulder.

“Fine, I think.” She glances at the chrono on the wall without really reading it. “I’ll let you get back to work. I... have to get home.” As she says the last part the strap on her bag snaps, spilling the contents all over the floor. _This day just keeps getting better and better._ Ahsoka scrambles to the ground, scooping pens and loose change back into the broken bag.

“Here, let me help you with that.” Lux swipes everything back into the bag with one motion. She smiles at him gratefully, doing a quick check to make sure she didn’t lose anything important. “Oh, here.” He reaches for a white waxed-paper bag lying a few feet away. It must’ve slid. He tries to hand it back to her but she shakes her head.

“You keep it. They’re cookies leftover from work.” Then a shiver of embarrassment runs through her. “But they were just on the floor of a clinic. So maybe no one should eat them.” He tucks the cookies into a pocket and smiles, picking the box of medical equipment back up.

“I’m not worried. They _were_ in the bag.” He starts down the row of curtains, then stops. “Goodbye, Ahsoka.” She nods at him and then heads for the door, face burning hotter than a firecracker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I’ve never been pregnant so I’m not entirely sure how prenatal checkups usually work. Luckily this is Star Wars so they’re probably different anyways. I apologize in advance for any mistakes I make.
> 
> As always, I hope you liked reading this as much as I liked writing it. As a note, I just got my assignment for a gift exchange and school will be starting relatively soon, so updates might slow down to once or twice a week in the future.


	3. Every Door We Ever Made

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s time for the incredibly long authors note about triggers!
> 
> So I don’t know how familiar you are with the storyline of Waitress (probably at least a few people here who are just Star Wars fans), but the main character being in a physically and emotionally abusive relationship is a major plot point. This is where the serious stuff begins.
> 
> There’s going to be domestic violence and some implied reproductive/sexual coercion. None of it is going to be super graphic, (ie. no torture porn, no explicit sexual content, non-consensual or otherwise), but if you’re uncomfortable with this content I comepletely understand. I won’t be offended if you want to find something else to read.
> 
> Let me just stress that this is not a depiction of a healthy relationship. Habee is a POS. Ahsoka should get the hell out of there. I’m going to do the corny thing and provide links to resources for people who might be in abusive relationships in the end notes, and if you need to talk drop a comment and I’ll figure out a way to contact you.

Ahsoka keys the door open, an audible click letting her know the apartment has unlocked. She hangs her bag on its hook by the door and kicks off her shoes. Performing a quick scan of the room, nothing seems in imminent need of cleaning or repair. The small kitchenette along on wall is in decent order, if not stocked with dishes she can’t find the energy to wash right now. The small couch and cracked holocaster sat on the other half of the room. A tiny hall contains three more doors, one of which is ajar. The holocaster is blaring a sports program, Habee sitting on the couch watching it.

He sits up as she walks in, casting a contemptuous glance in her direction. From the purple tones gathering in his face, she guesses that he’s drunk. A look at the small side table confirms this, several cans of alcohol lying on top of it. Ahsoka doesn’t like the expression on his face. She drops her gaze to the rug. Habee’s never liked eye contact. He peels himself up from the couch and walks slowly towards her. 

“Where were you?” he asks, stopping directly in front of her. Having set her bag down she fiddles with the hem of her waitress’s uniform, not daring to glance up at him. A million thoughts, answers and excuses run through her mind. Habee grabs her chin roughly and forces her to look up. “I asked you a question.” She shrinks back, stepping away from him.

“The transport broke down. I had to wait while they fixed it.” He reaches out and grabs a lekku roughly, yanking her closer. She lets out a yelp as he pulls on the sensitive organ. _That’s gonna bruise._

“You know what I think?” His breath smells like beer, the hot air coming in small puffs right in front of her face. “I think you’re a liar. You know why?” She tries to pull away but he holds on tighter. A small part of her wants to punch him, to bite him, to run out of the house and never return. But the part of her that’s been living with Habee since she was fourteen knows better. That all of those things will only make this worse. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Habee! Let me go! Please!” His hand moves to her shoulder, capturing it in an iron grip. _More bruises._

“I know you didn’t come right home because I was waiting for you at the transport.” He pins her to the wall, regarding her with a murderous expression. “Do you know how stupid I looked, standing there alone? You made me look stupid, Ahsoka. I don’t like looking stupid.” She squirms in his grip, pleading weakly for her release. “So where were you, huh? Hanging around with that Skywalker guy? That Kenobi? You’re mine. You know the rules.” He pulls back a fist and it moves entirely too quickly toward’s her face.

“I’m pregnant.” It slips out like sand between fingers. Habee’s blow stops inches from her face, and his expression morphs into something entirely different. “I was up at the clinic on level 57.” His fist lowers slowly, unclenching.

“How long have you known?” The anger surges back up and Ahsoka can practically feel it. “When were you planning on telling me?” A wave of panic rushes through her, then her first bit of luck today finally comes out.

“I thought I was just sick. I didn’t tell you because... I wanted to surprise you. Later, when you’re not so... tired.” The words are quick on Ahsoka’s tongue for once. The storm clouds of Habee’s anger lift. A small smile breaks out over his Togrutan features.

“This is great, baby.” The grip on her shoulder loosens. “I’m gonna be a dad! We’re gonna be a real family.” His hand reaches up to her face and strokes her cheek, and she can’t help but let a few tears fall. The soft touch reminds her of the early days, when Habee didn’t hit or scream. Not as much, anyways. He pulls her into a hug and she stiffens, unable to relax. The smell of cheap beer grows stronger. “Aww. I’m sorry baby. You just make me upset sometimes when you don’t tell me where you’re going.” His hands begin to wander and a jolt runs through her. _Good god not right now!_ “Let me make it up to you.” 

And when she’s lying, sweaty, her back pressed against his chest, she feels a little disgusted with herself. Because however much she hates Habee and however much she didn’t want to sleep with him, it still felt good. Tears begin to flow down her cheeks. _I wish someone would tell me what I should do._ She peels herself away from the drunk, sleeping man and crosses the room to look out her window. 

Speeders flash past at breakneck speed. Her mind wanders to Obi-Wan and Anakin. The men care for her, that’s clear enough. For a second she imagines running away and living with them, raising her baby with the coolest uncles in the galaxy. Then she sighs and lets the image fade. _They’ve got enough to worry about without my problems._ Her forehead touches the cool transparisteel and her eyes close. _I can fix this. I can try._

* * *

At work the next morning Anakin is waiting by the door to ambush her. She’s barely tied on her apron when he throws down the inventory datapad and rushes over, a concerned expression on his face. She winces. Her stomach is feeling a bit tender this morning, though not nearly as violent as it had several days ago. What worries her now is the purple-ish bruise on her lekku. There’s not a lot of quality makeup for non-human species, and there’s very little she can do about covering anything on her head-tails because of the intricate pattern.

“How did it go? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?” He reels himself in for a moment. “Sorry, I guess... I don’t know if you’re going to keep it or...” Ahsoka puts a hand out and rests it on his shoulder. _It’s not like the thought hasn’t crossed my mind._

“I’m 14 weeks along. And yeah, I’m gonna keep it.” She heads into the kitchen and preheats the oven, pulling out her mixing bowls and various ingredients. “I, uh, told Habee.” Ahsoka can’t see his face but she can guess what expression is on it. 

“How did that go?” She pours three cups of flour into the bowl, then adds in a pinch of salt.

“Surprisingly well.” Now she grabs the sugar and measures it out into the bowl. “He’s excited. About being a dad.” Anakin snorts.

“Sorry. But I don’t think he’s going to-” Ahsoka cuts him off, thrusting a container of bantha milk into his hands.

“I know. Trust me, I do. Will you hold this?” He takes the milk, dumbfounded, while she pours oil into a separate bowl. “Thanks. So, how did your ‘business’ go?” She grabs the carton back from him and catches a look at the grin on his face. 

“It was great. Better than great!” Ahsoka rolls her eyes and pours the milk in with the oil. 

“Can you tell me what she looks like, at least?” Now she adds baking soda to the flour, sugar and salt. His mouth pops open.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Anakin leans against the counter, feigning casual. He almost upends her baking tray.

“Be like that, then.” She adds the wet to the dry, stirring them together into a dough. “Any clue how Obi-Wan’s caf date went?” He shakes his head, repositioning the tray.

“He didn’t get back ‘til after I did, and I got home _late_. I’m going out on a limb and saying it went rather well.” A smirk crosses her lips.

“Don’t you have work in the back room?” she wonders loudly. 

“I like the kitchen better. It reminds me of cooking with my mom. She never let me do anything, but I would sit in the kitchen and she’d make up these crazy stories about pirates and Jedi and giant space ships.” Her heart softens. Anakin doesn’t talk about his mom. Not even Obi-Wan knows what happened to her, or why he ended up on the streets of Coruscant at ten with a scar on his thigh where a slave transmitter would go. _Unless he does and neither of them told me._

“Do you want to help me finish these, then?” He smiles and takes a lump of dough from the bowl, rolling it into a ball like he’s seen her do a thousand times. “No, like this.” The kitchen is warm and the four is soft. Baking with Anakin is almost enough to make her forget the bruises and the lingering nausea. It’s almost enough to send her back to Shili, baking with her mother in a kitchen far different than this one. 

When Obi-Wan sneaks in two minutes before his shift starts, as opposed to his usual ten, his hair is tousled, his eyes are red, and he’s drinking a very large mug of caf. Ahsoka looks him up and down and exchanges a look with Anakin. _He finally got layed_ , Anakin mouths, and she has to bite her tongue to keep from laughing. She walks up to the waitstation casually.

“You good?” she asks, startling him. He takes another sip of caf and runs his fingers through his hair before replying.

“About half as good as I look.” She makes a sympathetic face and then gets in her position by the counter. _At least he has tomorrow off._ Ahsoka focuses on the task at hand, reminding herself to grill him later. It’s her day out among the tables and as it gets into motion she can almost forget about the tiny Togruta growing inside her. Almost.

She moves around the room, getting people’s orders as Obi-Wan (looking significantly more alert) seats them. She arrives at the last empty table to find the pair of Jedi she almost threw up on last time. The ends of her lekku curl a little, but she highly doubts either of them will notice. Transfixing a customer smile on her face, she pulls out the pad of filmsi she writes orders on (Dex is _way_ old fashioned).

“Can I get you two something to drink?” The Kel Dor studies her with a look she can’t quite read.

“Are you feeling better today?” Ahsoka is confused, then realizes that he probably remembers the mad-dash-to-the-fresher incident as well as she does. 

“I’m fine, thank you.” She gives him a half-smile. “Just had a little too much caf that morning.” He must accept this, because he doesn’t ask anymore questions. The woman orders a caf and a muffin, and Ahsoka would be lying if she said she wasn’t at least a little relieved when it came time to walk away. As she walks past Anakin on her way to the kitchen she notices he still has the same moony-eyed expression aimed at the Jedi woman.

“Think your ‘business partner’ would be pleased to see you looking at her like that?” He jumps and stammers a response, but she’s already past him and into the kitchen where she takes some pies out of the oven and sets them on the rack to cool. With Anakin’s help she made two extra to keep in the preserver, so it’s no time at all until she’s back out making the rounds. Anakin's taken the order out to the Jedi table, where the woman is nowhere to be seen. Her mug is empty and her plate clean, so Ahsoka heads over to clear the dishes away.

“Is it okay if I take this?” she asks, hands hovering over said dishes. The Kel Dor looks up at her, and though she can’t see his eyes through the pressurized goggles she thinks there might be concern in his expression.

“You’re very young for a job like this.” For some reason she feels like he’s not talking about the diner. She looks at the floor, holding one elbow and letting the arm dangle. _He can’t possibly know. I look like I ate a big lunch, not like I’m pregnant._

“If I was still on Shili I would have my akul teeth by now.” The words seem immature and whiny when she says them out loud. His respiratory mask bobs on his face.

“Perhaps you should return there.” The Jedi woman walks back towards them, though Ahsoka didn’t hear the refresher door open. She raises an eyebrow and Ahsoka quickly grabs the plate and mug. As she walks away she hears the woman say “What was that about?”

Ahsoka honestly wishes she knew. 

* * *

After their shift, Anakin and Ahsoka corner Obi-Wan in the little hallway. He grabs his jacket and tries to push past them, but they both move to stand in his way. Anakin crosses his arms over his chest and Ahsoka puts her hands on her hips. He sighs and leans up against the wall.

“What do you two want?” Anakin grins.

“Details.” Obi-Wan rolls his eyes and lets out a groan.

“Can’t you two grill me when I’m not half-asleep?” Neither of them respond, and Obi-Wan lets out a sigh. “Fine. So yesterday night I borrowed one of Anakin’s shirts and headed out for a caf with a woman I met on the holonet.” 

“And it went so well you didn’t get home until after Anakin?” Ahsoka presses, grinning.

“No, actually.” Obi-Wan says, “The caf went horribly. The woman I was supposed to meet showed up thirty minutes late and was flirting with a man sitting at a nearby table the whole time. We went our separate ways and I don’t see another date with her in the future. So I headed for home.” He stops and Anakin gives a frustrated sigh.

“So what happened that made you so late?” Before Obi-Wan can continue, Anakin holds up a hand. “And if you say the transport broke down I’m going to throw you.” Obi-Wan laughs.

“Even with your ‘prodigious’ strength I highly doubt you could throw me.” Anakin cracks his knuckles threateningly.

“Is that a challenge?” Ahsoka rolls her eyes.

“Can you just tell us what happened on the way home after the damn caf?” Obi-Wan shifts uncomfortably, fiddling with the zipper on his jacket. 

“You’re not going to let that go, are you? Very well. I was walking down the street when I heard a scream. Naturally, I decided to investigate and it led me to an alleyway on level 45. In the alleyway was a woman and a gang of Toydarians. They were trying to rob her. So I dusted off my fighting skills and punched one right between the wings.” Anakin snorts.

“And how’d that turn out for you?” 

“Not very well, in the beginning. The three Toydarians ganged up on me, and they had vibroblades. I managed to avoid getting murdered for about a minute when the woman jumped in and started helping. Together we were able to beat them off. Her name is Satine, and she’s Mandalorian. We gave each other our contact information, but I highly doubt anything will come from it.” Ahsoka raised an eyebrow.

“Why not?” she asks. A hint of pride glints in Obi-Wan’s eyes.

“Duchesses don’t often holocall resturant hosts who live on the lower levels of Coruscant.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These are a few of the most helpful ones. They have good resources for getting help and identifying abuse. 
> 
> loveisrespect.org  
> thehotline.org  
> teendvmonth.org (this one is specifically designed for teenagers)
> 
> ACTUAL IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT THE FIC:  
> I’ve decided to update this fic every Friday. (Not tomorrow, though. Sorry.) A few other days might be thrown in here and there, but you can count on Fridays unless I tell you otherwise. Also, thank you for all of the love this random piece of crack has gotten! I honestly didn’t think it would do too well, so all the comments, kudos, and hits are very appreciated.


	4. What Happens Then?

Obi-Wan shifts around uncomfortably on the transport to the lower levels. Ahsoka sits beside him, hands folded in her lap. She’s relieved to note that she doesn’t _look_ pregnant, not much at least. More like ‘I ate a big lunch’. It doesn’t feel like much either. Everything she’s ever heard, every holodrama she’s ever seen, none of it is like actually being pregnant. Except for the vomiting. There’s plenty of that in all the tales about pregnancy. But none of them mentioned the uncomfortable amount of pimples currently popping up on her face. Washing twice a day doesn’t do anything to quell those. 

“It’s our stop.” she says to the older man, climbing to her feet. He sighs, following her out onto the platform.

“I still don’t think this is necessary.” Ahsoka rolls her eyes and leads him into the level, down a street of warehouses and into a bustling marketplace.

“You’re going out on a date with honest-to-stars royalty. One of Anakin’s old shirts is not going to cut it.” She guides him further in, where merchants sell clothes hanging from hastily constructed stalls. “Honestly, I thought he was coming along to this. Guess his ‘business’ is more important than his friends.”

“I think I can shop for myself, thank you very much.” She snorts as he stops to inspect a luridly patterned shirt covered in a design of leaves and feathers.

“You have no taste. What this woman sees in you...” Ahsoka’s voice trailed off as she caught sight of a very familiar face. She tries to move out of the way but unfortunately the handsome volunteer from the medical center is making his way towards them. 

“Hello!” he says, “Didn’t think I’d be running into you again.” She gives him a smile, and Obi-Wan coughs loudly. She turns to him, trying to convey what she needs to say in one expression. It doesn’t work. 

“Hi!” she says, “Um, Obi-Wan, this is Lux... Bonteri? Right? And Lux, this is Obi-Wan Kenobi.” The two men look each other over, Obi-Wan with a guarded expression on his face and Lux with a curious one. _I don’t know what’s going to happen next but if Obi-Wan says something about Habee or the pregnancy I’m going to die._ Quickly, she makes up a plan of distraction. “What brings you to the lower levels?” Lux turns to her and smiles. He’s not wearing the scrub-like uniform of the free clinic, just a pair of pants and a shirt. They’re well made, that’s obvious, and he sticks out like a sore thumb among the residents of level 76. 

“I just got off my hours at the clinic and decided to look around for a bit. Eat something, maybe.” He glances around the street warily. “Needless to say, I’m hopelessly lost.” Obi-Wan folds his arms over his chest.

“How do you two know each other?” Ahsoka’s lekku curl a little.

“He was volunteering at the free clinic when I went the other day.” She shoots Lux a sheepish grin. “My bag broke and he helped me pick up all the junk I had in there.” _He also caught me having a mental breakdown while leaning against a wall, but you don’t need to know that. Because if I told you you’d give me that Obi-Wan look._

“Oh, I forgot to thank you. Those were excellent cookies!” Now Obi-Wan looks even more suspicious.

“You gave him cookies?” The tone is accusatory. Ahsoka ignores him.

“We’re here to buy Obi-Wan some clothes for his fancy date tommorow.” _Put him on the spot for once._ It works, the bearded man blushing and fielding questions from Lux. The conversation does come back around eventually.

“Do either of you know a good place to eat around here?” Obi-Wan gives her a look that says ‘you’re answering this one’, so she casts around mentally for a good restaurant or food stall in the area.

“Seela’s got a little food shack a few streets over that’s pretty good. If you like Rylothian food.” 

“I don’t think I’ve ever had Rylothian food before.” _What sort of rock has this boy been living under?_ Then she laughs at herself a little. _I guess he’s been living on the rock and we’re all living under it._

“Then you should try some. It’s, uh, really good.” _Gah! Where is my tongue?_ Obi-Wan has an amused expression on his face. He puts a hand on her shoulder.

“Why don’t you show him where it is?” His tone is teasing but gentle. Ahsoka considers it for a moment. _Habee’s finally off actually working, so I don’t have to worry about being home late. And Seela_ does _make really good fried mynock._ _And I want to do something for myself for once._ The last one is less of a statement and more of a secret, buried hope. “Contrary to popular belief I can find clothing that won’t make me look like a disgrace.”

“Like I believe that.” She smiles uncertainly at Lux. “Well, I can show you the way. If you don’t mind a dinner buddy.” He smiles back, making a forward motion with his hand.

“Lead the way.”

* * *

Seela’s isn’t really crowded when they show up, though it’s never truly crowded. There’s rumors that Seela runs an unlicensed club after hours, rumors Ahsoka can neither confirm nor deny _._ Her companion stares uncertainly at the shabby exterior, taking in chipped green paint and a rickety screen door. Yellow lines run along the bottom, and a sign reading ‘Seel’ahan’s Nima Ven’ hangs a few feet above the door.

“Are you sure this is the right place?” Ahsoka walks forward and swings the old-fashioned door out of the way, gesturing for him to follow.

“I know it looks rough but it’s clean and the food is good.” He takes a few steps forward. “And you can meet Seela. Fair warning; she’s going to ask if you’re my boyfriend.” _Even though she knows I have one._ A shy smile comes over his face and he follows her inside. Ahsoka inhales deeply, the smells of hot oil and ryll kor lotion combining in an odor not altogether unpleasant. She leads Lux up to the counter where they take a pair of rickety barstools.

The floor is scuffed metal and the walls are peeling paper on the top half and green paneling on the bottom. Lanterns hanging from ceiling tiles illuminate the small space with a soft glow. They’re the only customers at the moment, and Seela herself is nowhere to be seen. Ahsoka calls out a greeting over the counter and through the small pass-through that leads into the kitchen. When Seela’s head pops out Lux lets out a small gasp, and she doesn’t blame him.

Rylothian food suggests that the proprietor would be a Twi’lek. And Seela is a Twi’lek. But when most people hear ‘Twi’lek’ they think of the sultry-looking women that dangle off Hutts and dance in spacer clubs, not pudgy, older women. And Seela isn’t just pudgy and a bit past her dancing days, she’s also missing a lekku. Her right one and the tip of her left one, as a matter of fact. Either way, she either doesn't notice or chooses to ignore Lux’s outburst because she doesn’t pause before exiting the kitchen and coming up behind the counter.

“What do we have here, honey? You finally bring home a _nice_ boy?” Her accent is thick with the tones of the Coruscanti underworlders. Lux still looks a bit uncertain but Ahsoka smiles at the older woman.

“This is my friend Lux. He’s never had Rylothian food and I told him you have the best on the level.” Seela barks out a laugh, looking Lux up and down. She nods approvingly, then turns her sharp-eyed gaze to inspect gaze to Ahsoka. A puzzled expression dances over her face.

“I suppose congratulations are in order?” _Oh no_. Ahsoka’s lekku twitch slightly, something that only the well-trained eyes of Seela Han would notice. “You told Habee yet?” Lux gives her a confused look and she avoids eye contact.

“He knows.” Seela makes a loud clucking noise and twitches her remaining lek in a manner Ahsoka can only describe as ‘Can you believe this?’.

“Well then. Howabout I get you and your friend here something to eat?” Ahsoka nods her assent, stopping Seela right before she’s about to leave.

“How can you tell?” A rueful smile crosses Seela’s face.

“Honey, I’ve spent enough time in enough harems that I can spot that look a thousand miles away.” Now Lux looks really confused.

“What was all that about?” he asks, turning to her. Ahsoka sighs.

“For some reason, Seela can tell...” she pauses, searching for the right words and finding none. “That I’m going to have a baby.” She’s expecting horror, revulsion, shock. After all, everyone knows only loose girls get pregnant before they’re married. But his expression is more curious than anything else.

“You are?” He shrugs. “Uh, cool. I guess.” Even the elegant upper-leveler is struggling with his words today. “Do you know who the father is?” She folds her arms across her chest uncomfortably. _Is that what people usually ask when you tell them you’re pregnant?_

“My boyfriend, Habee. He took me with him when we left Shili a few years ago.” Something in Lux seems to deflate a little, and Ahsoka finds herself wondering if Lux might’ve been into her. Human expressions are similar to Togrutan ones, but without the added benefit of facial markings to dramatize the features and small movements of the lekku to hint at their inner feelings. 

“Congratulations.” Ahsoka makes a face and picks up a paper napkin from a holster nearby.

“I wish everyone would stop saying that.” The look on Lux’s face changes instantly.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Is that why you were at the clinic?” She pulls on the napkin and it nearly rips.

“No, I’m keeping it... Habee wouldn’t let me, anyway. But I’m just not so happy about it.” The stool creaks underneath her as she shifts her weight. “What can I give this baby? I work nearly fifty hours a week at a diner. I live in a tiny, three room apartment in the Twilight Zone. My boyfriend’s a loser.” There’s a pregnant pause. “Sorry. You... probably don’t care.” She chances a glance up at his face and the concern on his features sends a jolt through her stomach.

“But I do care.” Lux says softly. Then he blushes, sitting up straight again, his tone changing. “I mean, you’re a patient at the clinic so it’s practically my job. And you seem like a lovely person.” She smiles at him, twisting the napkin into even smaller pieces.

“You do, too.” He smiles back, extending a hand.

“Friends, then?” She takes it.

“Friends.”

* * *

Obi-Wan sits across the table from Ahsoka, arms folded across his chest. A card game lays abandoned in front of them. They’re at his apartment, though Anakin is nowhere to be seen. Apparently it’s been like that for a while, the young man sneaking out every night he can to meet a mysterious someone. They’ve exhausted that line of conversation, and come back around to the elephant in the room.

“We have to talk about it some time.” Ahsoka’s lekku twitch.

“You’re just stalling because you have such a bad hand.” she says. Obi-Wan rolls his eyes and lays his hand out on the table.

“You know that’s not true.” he gestures to the admittedly excellent hand in front of him. “Before I kick your ass at sabacc _again_ , we need to talk about this new friend of yours.” 

“He’s just a guy I met the other day at-” He raises a hand to stop her.

“I didn’t say anything back at the market because I didn’t want to embarrass either of you, but I recognized him.” _Really? How?_ But she tries to play it cool, shrugging and not responding. “I’ve been- well, I figured if I was going out with politics then I should look into politics. Lux Bonteri is the son of the senator of Onderon. I have no idea what he was doing at a free clinic, but I don’t think you should be hanging around with him.” _The son of a freaking senator?_ She pushes that to the back of her mind to think about later.

“Why not?” She gestures to him. “You’re dating a senator! Why can’t I be friends with one?” Obi-Wan’s face reddens.

“First of all, I’m not dating the duchess. We’re just going out for kaf tomorrow. Second of all, she’s not a senator, she’s a duchess. Technically. If you paid any attention at all to intergalactic politics you’d know there’s a difference.” Ahsoka huffs.

“Well I’ve been kind of busy with other things lately.” It stings him, and she can see the hurt in his eyes. “That was too far. Sorry. I just don’t understand. What’s wrong with hanging out with him? He’ll probably get bored of me within a week and I’ll never hear from him again.”

“I just want you to be careful, Ahsoka.” His eyes soften. “I know you haven’t had many friends since you took up with Habee, and I care about you. I want you to be able to be a teenager. But his intentions might not be as innocent as they seem.” She gives him a stare, crossing her arms over her chest.

“He knows I have a boyfriend.” Obi-Wan runs a hand through his hair, and it startles her to notice that he’s growing a little grey. _It’s strange. Sometimes it feels like I’ve known him forever when in reality it’s only been a few years._

“Fine.” He pauses and looks at her, his tone changing. “I want to know what your plan is.” She looks at him quizzically.

“What plan?” Obi-Wan rolls his eyes.

“For when the baby gets here.” She frowns and props her head on one hand, studying the table. _My plan. Pretend everything is completely fine and normal until the last possible second._

“I don’t really have one.” He runs his hand through his hair again, standing it on end. He looks a bit like a mad scientist.

“Then you won’t mind if I make a suggestion?” She shakes her head. “I know Anakin has offered for you to come live with us. I also know you’re too proud to accept that. So let me ask you something. If you went back to Shili, would you have a place there?” A shock runs through her. _Could I go back to Shili? Would my family want me?_ The face of her mother swims in front of her, quickly replaced by the note she’d left on her bed. 

“I don’t know.” The emotions rushing through her are complicated. _If I left Coruscant I’d never have to talk to Habee again. There would be grass and trees and animals. But I’d never see Anakin or Obi-Wan again. I’d never know what happened to him and the duchess he rescued, find out what, or who, Anakin keeps sneaking off to see._ She lets out a big huff of air. “I feel stuck.”

The older man puts a hand on her shoulder, and the simple gesture makes her feel like everything might be okay after all. “We’re here for you, Ahsoka. You’re not stuck. I was just putting the idea out there; you don’t have to leave Coruscant if you don’t want to.” The words of the Kel Dor in the diner come back to her. _Perhaps you should return there._ She shuts her eyes and tries to focus on not exploding.

Obi-Wan sighs and glances at the chrono on the chipped-looking wall.

“Anakin should’ve been back by now.” _Oh thank the stars we’re changing the subject._ She glances towards the door, then back at Obi-Wan.

“Do you have any idea where he’s been going?” He shakes his head, then starts to say something when the door slides open. Anakin walks in, looking a little flustered. He looks at Ahsoka, surprised, then at Obi-Wan, a little guilty.

“Hi Snips. Obi-Wan.” The door slides shut behind him and he stands awkwardly in the entryway. “How are you doing?” There’s a small, almost unnoticeable bruise right above his collar. Ahsoka snorts.

“Have a good evening, Skyguy?” He brings up a hand to his neck and runs over to the mirror in horror. Both of the card players burst into laughter at the panicked expression on his face.

“Honestly, Anakin, are you ever going to tell us about this mystery person you keep running off to meet?” Obi-Wan asks after a few moments, collecting the cards into a pile. Anakin takes a seat at the rickety table and pulls up his collar.

“Laugh all you want. You’re just jealous that I’ve got a hot girlfriend to sneak around with.” Ahsoka, who’s been tilting back her chair, suddenly drops it onto all four legs. 

“Aha! So it’s a woman!” Anakin gives her a look. “What? For all I know you could’ve been running spice for the Hutts.” He rolls his eyes. “Anyway, so she’s hot? How’d you manage that?” A teasing smile crosses his lips and he tilts his head, doing a ridiculous impression of ‘seductive’.

“I have a way with the women.” She snorts.

“Did you use the sand line?” A look of shock crosses his face.

“How did you hear about that?” He turns to the bearded man across the table from them. “Obi-Wan! Why are you telling people about that? I was, like, seventeen!” Obi-Wan’s lips twitch.

“Here’s a piece of advice.” He drops his voice into a faux whisper. “If you’re going to flirt with women in a cantina, you shouldn’t do that by picking something random to complain about.” 

“Oh, and _you_ would know?” Ahsoka laughs.

“He’s the one dating a duchess.” 

“Well _I’m_ dating a-” he stops abruptly. Ahsoka gives him a searching look. “I’m not going to tell you.” He crosses his arms and sits back in his chair.

“You’re going to have to tell us eventually. You’re terrible at keeping secrets.” A light glints in his eyes.

“I take that as a challenge, Snips. I can keep a secret! In fact, I bet you and Obi-Wan will never find out who I’m dating on your own.” Ahsoka rolls her eyes. _I doubt that._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’ve been sitting on this for a while and editing it after school (which is crushing the life out of me, btw.) Hope it’s up to snuff!
> 
> Also: those of you who know Waitress will realize the titles have been lyrics from each song. I skipped ‘Club Knocked Up’ because none of the lyrics fit very well and ‘Pomatter Pie’ because it’s an instrumental.


	5. All That Wondering

“Everything seems to be progressing nicely.” The medical droid twitters, pulling in a few instruments it’s been using to scan her abdomen. “Do you have any questions or concerns?” Ahsoka thinks for a bit. _Not as many as I did last time._

“No.” The droid clicks, pivots on its wheelbase, and heads from the curtained cubicle. She shakes her head and pulls her bag onto her shoulder. The strap has been stitched back on more securely, and she tugs at it to test the integrity before following the droid out. It’s impossible to not walk slowly as she goes through the hallways. _I’m just tired from work_ , Ahsoka tells herself. Truthfully she’s never had more energy, but admitting to hoping a certain Onderonian will bump into her is a little hard to do. Even if she’d taken an extra slice of pie from the diner for this specific purpose.

The sound of feet comes towards her, and she turns around to see the familiar brown haired boy walking down the row of curtained cubicles. A smile creeps over her face and she stops so he can catch up. Once again he’s wearing street clothes, a well made shirt and pair of pants marking him as above the clinic’s usual pay grade. A bag of his own hangs from his arm. He smiles back at her as he approaches.

“How are you?” Ahsoka asks as he draws closer. He stops a few feet away from her.

“Well enough. It’s great to see you again.” There’s a pause for a moment, and the silence hangs awkwardly between them. Hoping to ease the tension she reaches into her bag and pulls out the pie. He takes it from her with a curious expression. 

“I remember you liked the cookies I gave you, so when we had some pie left over and I knew I was coming down here I grabbed some.” Her eyes fall to the ground. _Now I feel like an idiot. Why?_ “It’s, uh, corrilian apple.” She nearly jumps as another worn-out med droid trundles past them. She chances a glance up at Lux’s face. He’s smiling, and it sends a jolt through her stomach. _Habee wouldn’t like that._ She pushes that voice out of the way and focuses on the beautiful smile of the boy in front of her. 

“That’s really sweet.” He tucks it into the pocket on his bag. “Thank you, Ahsoka. I’m on my way out. You?” 

“I just finished my appointment.” She shoves her hands in the pockets of the jacket she pulled on this morning. The Coruscanti weather has been trending steadily downwards. There’s no reason why it can’t be warm and sunny one hundred percent of the year but apparently cold periods are good for the city. Or something. It doesn’t make much of a difference to Ahsoka; the lower levels are always cold.

“Do you want to walk with me?” She nods and follows Lux down the hallway, casting about for conversational topics. _Obi-Wan said he’s a senator’s kid. Maybe I could mention politics? I don’t know enough about politics to do that, though. The war, maybe? The weather?_ He saves her from having to come up with something. “How’d your appointment go?” She shrugs.

“Fine, I guess. Droid said that everything checks out with the baby.” However many times she’s talked to someone about the pregnancy, she still expects everyone to look at her with disgust. She does gets that, sometimes. Usually it’s pity, disinterest, or confusion. Lux looks at her like Obi-Wan and Anakin do, with sincerity. Like he cares. 

They talk about nothing important as they walk out of the clinic and down the front steps. Both of them stop at the bottom of the stairs and wait for a moment. Ahsoka pulls on the bag strap, adjusting its position.

“I guess I’ll see you around.” She turns to leave, heading towards the transport that will take her home, where she’ll have to be silent while Habee sleeps off hyperspace. Then something brushes her hand. She turns, and Lux looks like he tried to grab her hand and then snatched his own back. 

“Wait.” He pulls his arm in and folds his arms behind him, looking embarrassed. “I... I want to talk to you. More than we have been, I mean. Do you want to come for a walk with me?” _Habee definitely wouldn’t like that. At all._ She hesitates for a moment. _Habee doesn’t have to know._ Still conflicted, she decides to stall.

“Where to?”

“Anywhere.” They part for a minute to let a pair of gran walk into the clinic. “There’s a library nearby. Or the public forum.” Ahsoka’s never been to either of those places. She’s never been much of anywhere on Coruscant, actually. Habee doesn’t like her spending a lot of time out of the house. 

“Alright. But I have to be home by six or seven. Habee doesn’t like it when I’m out late.” He nods, as if understanding, but something flickers in his eyes. Ahsoka can read people well, but she’d rather leave that page blank. The look is probably the same one she gets at the diner from Anakin and Obi-Wan whenever she mentions the pale-skinned Togruta. Lux’s confident smile returns, and he gestures down the sidewalk.

“Great. Let’s get going, then.” She follows him, head spinning. _You’re just spending time with a friend_ , she reminds herself. But there’s something different about walking down the streets with Lux, close enough for her to reach out and take his hand. It’s not like playing cards at Obi-Wan and Anakin’s apartment, that’s for sure.

“Why do you volunteer at the clinic?” The question surprises her almost as much as it surprises him. They have to fight to be heard over the rumble of the city-planet, their conversation one of millions.

“I have to do service hours for school.” He frowns. “Well, _had_ to. I finished my hours but I like doing it and the director asked me to stay on. Why do you ask?” Ahsoka shrugs.

“You're from the upper levels. Usually nobody up there cares what’s going on down here. At least, not enough to come down here themselves and do anything about it.” They continue down the sidewalk a ways, Ahsoka following Lux. “That you’re actually working at a clinic is...” She trails off, unable to finish her sentence.

“Attractive?” She snorts, the ends of her lekku curling. _Thank the goddess for orange skin. It’s impossible for him to notice I’m embarrassed._

“Now you sound like Anakin. He’s always going on about how amazing he is.” They turn down a side street and move onwards.

“Anakin?” A smile comes to her lips.

“One of my best friends. We work together at Dex’s.” Ahsoka pauses for a moment. “He’s like a brother to me. I’d probably be lost right now without him and Obi-Wan.” They arrive at a large, open area of pavement. Benches and tables for the area, along with a few scraggly shrubs. There’s a cart selling drinks and things over in one corner. Lux, who has apparently been here before, leads her to a table along one of the walls. 

Uneasily, Ahsoka sits down across from him, placing her bag on the open seat next to her. Opposite her, Lux does the same. He studies her for a moment, his eyes intense. She looks away, her stomach lurching again. She’d blame it on the baby, except the vomiting has recently slowed down. This lurch is different, anyways. This lurch makes her want it to last longer. She tries to shove that thought out of the way, lock it up where it can’t hurt anybody. Make it into a pie. But the ingredients keep falling apart. 

“Your friend recognized me.” She looks up and meets his blue-grey eyes. “When I ran into you at the market two weeks ago. Did he... did he tell you who I am?” Her hands tighten on her bag strap. Truth be told she’s not all that worried about Lux being a senator’s son. It’s not like that’s stopped Obi-Wan from meeting up with his lady-friend whenever they’ve got a chance. And she’s not even going out with Lux. They’re just friends. _Is that what Habee would think?_

“He did.” He runs a hand through his brown hair, looking away from her. She can tell he’s a little upset, about what she can’t imagine. “I’m not upset that you didn’t tell me or anything. I mean, we’re practically strangers. I didn’t tell you I was pregnant the first time we ran into each other.” He flinches a little, and she can’t help but feel her stomach drop. _Why did I have to mention the pregnancy? He was alright earlier._

“I don’t want to be strangers.” Ahsoka tucks her hands underneath her to prevent herself from tearing her bag apart. “Everything just feels... _weird_. It’s not about you, I just... usually I can talk to anyone. You make it hard to put the words together.” Her stomach drops even lower.

“Then I should probably go.” Shock ripples across Lux’s face.

“Oh, no! That's not what I meant.” He sighs and runs his hand through his hair again. There’s a little rough patch formed by this, and Ahsoka has to fight the urge to reach out and smooth it over. She snaps back as he continues. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that you’re really nice, and you’re funny, and you smell good. Okay, maybe that last one’s a little weird, but I _like_ that you make it hard to talk. We just... don’t match. And that’s fine with me if it’s fine with you, but-”

“Please stop talking for a sec.” Ahsoka’s head is swimming with the torrent of words that just washed over her. She collects herself for a second. _I smell good? We don’t match?_ “Okay, keep going.” The expression on Lux’s face is unreadable.

“I want to be friends with you. But there’s a lot of stuff hanging over us.” The tiny balloon of hope that’s been inflating in her chest suddenly deflates and flies across the forum. _He’s going to tell me he doesn’t want to talk to me anymore._ Even though it’s what she told Obi-Wan, it makes her feel sad and even a little angry.

“So you _don’t_ want me to go but we can’t be friends?” 

“I’m saying I want to start again. We got off on a weird foot. Let’s be friends. Normal friends who aren’t politicians’ sons or twilighters.” There goes the old hope balloon, filling itself in her chest. _You can’t just be friends with him_. She successfully squashes that voice this time. _See if I can’t._

“Alright.” She smiles a little. “Hey there! My name’s Ahsoka Tano.” He smiles back.

“Nice to meet you, Ahsoka. I’m Lux Bonteri.” They shake hands like they did last time, but just for a second she allows their fingers to remain locked for a little bit longer than necessary. Then she lets go, feeling guilty. _Habee might be an asshole, but I made a commitment. A commitment that won’t be easily broken._

* * *

Ahsoka walks inside at around seven thirty. What she’s surprised to see is Habee sitting at the table, hands folded, scowling. He glares at her as she walks in, and she flinches as she hangs up her bag. _Got to put on my brave face._

“How’d you sleep?” He doesn’t respond, simply staring at her through narrowed eyes. She steps into the kitchen and puts down the other slice of pie she took home from work. _I can feel his eyes burning a hole into my uniform_. Dread begins to crawl through her, familiar and terrifying. _Did someone see me with Lux?_ She gathers her courage. “Is something wrong?”

“I’ll tell you what’s wrong!” Habee’s lekku are twitching with anger. “You’re nearly three hours late coming home. So where were you?” Ahsoka forces herself to take a deep breath. _Getting angry or running will only make it worse._

“I had an appointment at the clinic today. I thought told you about it.” It must be her lucky day because the anger seems to seep out of him. Mostly. He rolls his eyes.

“You and that stupid clinic. Always making me worry. You need to start writing stuff down, babe.” Relief floods through her. “How did it go?” _That’s a surprise._

“Um, pretty good. The med-droid said that the baby’s growing well.” A smile crosses Habee’s lips, and a ghost of the boy she met on Shili returns to his face. He crosses the room to her and puts a hand on her stomach. She flinches at his touch, jolting backwards into the cabinet. A flicker runs through his face, but he just repositions his hand and smiles at her. 

“That’s great.” He moves closer to her abdomen. “Hey there, baby. It’s your daddy, Habee. You better be a boy, so that I can teach you how to fly a cargo ship. We’ll be one hell of a a piloting team.” He turns looks back up at Ahsoka. “You don’t got to be afraid of me, babe. You haven’t done anything wrong.” And as he pulls her into a soft embrace, she wishes that was true. _Everything he just said was a lie._

“I’m glad you’re so... excited.” _At least someone wants this baby_. She keeps the last part to herself. _If I said that out loud..._ Habee steps back from her and regards her with something bordering on suspicion.

“You know, I was talking to my buddy Taz. He said that sometimes when ladies have babies they start to love them more than their man.” His hand trails along the soft curve of her lek. “You won’t do that, will you babe?” Ahsoka remains silent. _I already love lots of things more than I love you. What harm can one more do?_ Habee’s hand tightens on her lek. “I asked, will you babe?” She shakes her head. “Say it.”

“I won’t love the baby more than I love you, Hab.” She puts a hand on his lek and runs it up towards the montral. “I promise.” And as he pulls her in for a kiss, she lets herself wonder what things would be like if Habee actually loved her. If he worked a steady job and bitched about his boss. If he talked instead of hitting, asked instead of telling. _If, if, if._

That line of thinking carries her through until she’s lying in bed, waiting for sleep to come. She brings a hand down to the small bump that’s forming on her abdomen. It’s not much, really. Anyone looking at her walk down the street would have to really look to notice it. _There’s a whole new person living in there._ The concept is still abstract.

Ahsoka rolls over to face the window, watching the lights flash past. _I know what I promised earlier. I lied, though. I will love you more. I already do_. A smile crosses her lips. _Talking to my baby. Well, baby, I can’t promise you much but I can promise you this. I’m going to care. That might be all I have to give you_. She rolls back over. _I just hope it’s enough._

* * *

Ahsoka’s working the floor again. Really she’s thinking about her plans for after work. After her conversation with Lux they agreed to meet up at Dex’s and walk to Seela’s again. It’s a little nerve wracking, lying to Habee about extra shifts, the fact that he’s probably going to run into Anakin, the fact that someone might see them and tell Habee. But those are all risks she’s willing to take. Lux is her friend, it’s not like she’s cheating on Habee. Right?

She sleepwalks through the day until she finds herself in front of the two Jedi. A sense of panic fills her. What if the Kel-Dor says something weird again? That’s when Anakin bundles her out of the way.

“You should probably take a break, Snips. I’ll get this table.” She narrows her eyes.

“I’m not _that_ pregnant.” It _is_ around time to head back and check on the baked goods, but if she’s going to get enough money for the baby she’ll need all the tables she can get. “You’re supposed to be behind the counter.” He glances at the lady Jedi, maintains eye contact, then heads back to his original spot. Ahsoka shakes herself off and turns back to the table. “Sorry about that. What can I get you guys today?” 

Like always the Kel-Dor doesn’t order anything. Ahsoka finds herself studying the woman. Human expressions are odd, but it seems to her like the woman is a little embarrassed. Her cheeks have color and she doesn’t look at Ahsoka while she’s talking. Strangely enough the woman is also in the ‘fresher by the time Ahsoka comes back with a slice of pie. Again.

Before that has a chance to register the proper suspicion the Kel-Dor locks eyes with her. Well, locks goggles. She can’t really see his eyes. If human expressions require some effort than the Kel-Dor’s expression would require an entire class to interpret. Ahsoka puts one hand on her elbow and allows the other to dangle. It’s like the Jedi can stare right into her soul.

“Hello again.” He says in his calm voice. “I hope you’re well.” 

“Uh, I am. Thank you.” Her lekku begin to curl a little. “Is there anything else I can get you, sir?” He’s about to say something more when the woman returns and slides back into her seat, cheeks flushed. The Kel-Dor’s brow furrows.

“Are you alright, Padmé?” The brown haired woman, Padmé, looks up at him.

“I’m fine, master.” Without saying another word Ahsoka heads off to walk her rounds. _There was something very suspicious about all of that. The Kel-Dor makes me uncomfortable, but not nervous. That Padmé seems vaguely familiar. Anakin wanted to take on their table and made eye contact with her_. Suddenly she snaps to attention. _Anakin. Who won’t tell us who he’s going out with. Making eyes at a Jedi._ She sighs, makes a mental note to ask him about it later, and move on. _I’ve got bigger fish to fry,_ she thinks, pressing a wad of napkins onto the table of a panicking tyodarian who’s just spilled an entire cup of caf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the update coming so late in the day; ironically, I was baking instead of editing. (That semi-colon was probably used incorrectly but the right punctuation is currently eluding me.) 
> 
> Well, hope you enjoyed!


	6. That Sad One

He’s there in the alleyway after work. Lux stands out against the painted duracrete walls, arms folded. At the very least he’s made an effort to blend in, his clothes more suited to the lower levels than the well-made clothing he’s been sporting recently. When she sees him Ahsoka can’t help but grin, carefully shutting the diner’s heavy door behind her. He smiles at her, meeting her about halfway across the alley.

“Hey.” she says, putting her hands in her pockets.

“Hello.” Ahsoka’s about to say something really witty and clever when the door opens and deposits Anakin out onto the grimy walkway behind the diner. She doesn’t see him, but she can imagine the look on his face. So she turns, and it’s everything that she expected.

“Who’s your friend, Snips?” Her lekku curl a little at the nickname. “You didn’t tell me you had plans for after work.” 

“This is my friend Lux.” She turns to the brown haired boy. “This is my _other_ embarrassing friend, Anakin.” Said friend comes up to stand next to her, crossing his arms and scanning the boy like he might a broken droid. To his credit, Lux doesn’t even flinch. He stands up straight and holds out a hand to shake. Anakin eyes him suspiciously for another long moment, then takes it. 

“Nice to meet you, Lux.” He turns his scrutinizing gaze to Ahsoka. “We should talk later. About that- um, broken decompressor. I think we should disintermediate the shattered hypos.” 

“What?” Anakin rolls his eyes.

“Talk to me later, got it?” He glances at Lux. “If he gives you any trouble let me know.” Ahsoka’s lekku curl, which Anakin notices. He grins and pats her on the shoulder. “See you tomorrow, Snips.” Then he heads out of the alleyway and leaves a slightly bewildered Lux and a very bewildered Ahsoka.

“ _What_ is he fixing for you?” She shrugs as they begin to walk.

“Nothing, as far as I know. I think he was hinting that he wants to speak to me privately.” Ahsoka says, “As you can see, Anakin is the master of subtlety.” Lux laughs, and it’s a good laugh. The friendly kind. They chat as they walk, not about anything important. They’re about halfway there when he suddenly stops short at the mouth of an alley, looking around wildly. Ahsoka raises an eyebrow at him, and he blushes.

“I just thought I saw- it’s not important.” She shrugs it off and they move on to Seela’s, Ahsoka determined to have a good evening. 

Talking to Lux is like talking to Anakin and Obi-Wan, except for when it isn’t. He doesn’t try to pester her with advice and is surprisingly interested in the plights of the twilighters. In return, she listens to him talk about the intricacies of politics in the senate (a subject she knows almost nothing about but finds a hitherto unknown interest in) and his tight schedule of school and political studies. 

“So how do you manage to get out here?” she asks him after an explanation of his weird class schedule. He smiles.

“I may or may not have told them I spend more time at the clinic than I actually do.” Ahsoka can respect that. Habee is currently under the impression that she’s working another shift, though Lux probably won’t get beaten for lying. Maybe grounded- that’s what happens in the holodramas. Though in her experience, those aren’t always realistic.

“Well, you are a politician.” It takes him a second but then he puts his hand to his chest in mock offense.

“I am a very honest man, thank you very much.” Ahsoka shakes her head.

“Honest. Couldn’t think of a better word to describe you. No, I could. Pasty, for one.” Now he looks actually offended, shooting a covert glance down at his hands.

“I am _not_ pasty!” Ahsoka smiles.

“All humans are pasty compared to Togrutas. Even the pale ones are more of a grey-ish white than you weird sand-colored people. You’d stick out like a plant growing out of durastseel on Shili.” Lux laughs too, then regards her with some seriousness.

“So you were born on Shili.” Ahsoka nods, remembering.

“Yep. One of the smaller towns; most people there still foraged for their food. Not quite hunting with their teeth anymore, but it was still hand to mouth for everyone. That’s why we left.” Something shifts in Lux’s eyes.

“You and your boyfriend.” She nods.

“Habee. His buddies told him stories about places like this, where there wasn’t a blade of grass in sight. There’s lots of grass on Shili, it’s why we’re striped. So he came here, and I went with him.” She looks down at the counter. “Maybe that wasn’t a good idea.” 

“Do you miss it?” She takes in a deep breath and exhales again.

“Yes but no. I was happy _enough_ there, but I wouldn’t change leaving. Lots of good things have happened on Coruscant. I met Anakin and Obi-Wan, learned a lot about people.” She chances a glance back up at him before saying, “Met you.” He smiles back, but he hesitates before saying,

“And your baby?” It’s both a question and an addition to the list. Ahsoka places a hand on her abdomen.

“I guess I’ll have to see.” 

* * *

Ahsoka is moving as fast as she can without causing suspicion. There’s roughly five minutes until she’s late, and if she is Habee will be furious. The transport can only move so fast, though, and she finds herself with her face pressed against the window, ticking off the seconds. She parted with Lux quickly, though not quickly enough to stop by and talk to Anakin. _I’ll talk to him after work tomorrow_ , she promises herself.

She steps into the dingy apartment and calls out a greeting, glancing at the chrono above the stove. Luckily, she’s exactly on time. Habee emerges from the recesses of the apartment, and Ahsoka remembers it was his night out with his friends. Mainly because of the way he smells, but also in the cast of his eyes. She avoids eye contact and instead hangs her bag and jacket from their hooks. 

“How’d we do today, babe?” Ahsoka reaches into the bag, then hesitates for a moment as her fingers find the credits. _I told him I was working another shift. But I only did the one. So that means..._ she pulls the credits out slowly, the slim tiles slipping through her fingers slightly. She drops them into Habee’s outstretched hand. He scowls down at them, as if they’re an insult. “What the hell is this? You worked the dinner shift! Where’d all the money go?” 

“It was a slow day.” His scowl moves to her, and she takes a step back. Habee’s hands fly up and grab her roughly on the upper arms. “Habee, please! I’m doing the best I can! You’re hurting me!” She’s shoved roughly against the wall, and instantly her thoughts fly to her stomach and the baby growing in there. _Shit. Shit Shit Shit._ “Stop! Habee!” He’s leaning into her now, pushing her against the wall.

“It was a slow day,” he mimics, his voice a high pitched falsetto, “Ow, you’re hurtin’ me!” He laughs, the rotten fruit scent of the alcohol filling her nose. Tears begin to trickle from her eyes, and she tries to yank away from him.

“Habee, the baby! Stop!” That seems to slow him down for a second. She’s no longer at risk of being punched or shoved to the ground, but he keeps her pinned to the wall. His eyes are on hers, angry, and she’s afraid of what she sees there. They hold for a moment, breathing in and out heavily.

“You shouldn’t make me so angry at you!” He protests, giving her a final shove into the wall and releasing her arms. She winces, rubbing the spots where his hands were. _That’s going to leave a mark._ “Not with the baby! What if I had decided to teach you a lesson, huh? Then where would we be?”

“I’m sorry.” she nearly whispers the words, curling in on herself. Her hands find the little bump under her shirt and she crosses her arms across her body to protect it, just in case Habee changes his mind. Her boyfriend snorts.

“Sorry.” He shakes his head. “Why don’t you prove it?” Ahsoka forces herself to walk across the small kitchenette, three steps, three miles. She presses a light kiss to his lips, pulling away timidly. “Better.” Tension still fills every muscle. _If he comes after me again I’m running out that door and never coming back._ But he doesn’t. He lets her go, getting a drink from the fridge and sliding down on the couch. “Come over here and watch something with me, babe. It’s been a while.” ‘I’m tired’ jumps to her lips but she squishes it back down. _I hate it when he’s angry one minute and fine the next._

Habee turns on the TV to one of the stupid holodramas that play later in the evening. One of the things that surprises her about him is what he actually likes. _He spends so much time yelling about what he hates. _A purple Twi’lek, garbed in a sensually censored approximation of a harem outfit, is tied to a wall. She’s crying out for someone to come save her or something stupid like that. Ahsoka nearly jumps out of her skin when Habee’s hand drifts from her shoulder to her stomach.__

She mentally prepares herself for it to continue, reaching for the spot between her legs, his other hand traveling over to touch her breasts- but it doesn’t. It settles over the small bump possessively, almost as though Habee’s not thinking about the gesture. Ahsoka certainly is.

She’s on edge, tense, unable to relax. The barely-there curve is only slightly larger than the natural fat deposit that sat there before this whole mess, but it carries so much more weight. _What if he just starts crushing his hand in? What if he punches me in the stomach?_ Ahsoka envies the purple Twi’lek now, who’s got her handsome smuggler friend to save her from the pirates. _Where are the smugglers when you need them?_

As she shifts, praying that Habee will remove his hand soon or at least fall asleep so she can sneak away to shower, another thought occurs to her. _I don’t trust him. Not even with a bump. How the hell will I trust him when the baby gets here? _An image comes to mind of a crying baby. _Habee would yell at it. And when that fails..._ she shudders. Her boyfriend pulls her closer, interpreting the tremors as cold. Her lekku curl.__

_I can’t let that happen._ She swallows hard. _But how can I stop it?_

* * *

“This is amazing!” Ahsoka exclaims, flipping through the biology textbook Lux has decided to lend her. “Shili schools were never this in-depth about... well, anything!” He has a pleased smile on his face, and, not for the first time, Ahsoka has to resist the urge to kiss him on the lips. Instead she takes his hand and squeezes it, setting the book down on the counter.

“It’s just an old textbook.” He protests, his face reddening. She makes eye contact with him, trying to convey her feelings.

“Not to me.” The smile he gives her in return is so geniune that she has to look away first. Now it’s herturn to be embarrassed, her lekku curling a little. She releases his hand and tucks the book into the bag at her feet, focus returning to the bowl of broth on the counter in front of her. “So. How’s school going for you?” Lux shrugs.

“It’s alright, I suppose. I’ve got midterms coming up soon that I should study for.” He sighs and glances at his own bag, which is full of textbooks for his classes. A solitary notebook peeks out. “I can’t really stay long.” A thought crosses Ahsoka’s mind.

“I can help you study.” She plucks the notebook from his bag and flips to a random page, squinting at the tiny but neat handwriting, formulating a question. “Who were the first people of Coruscant?” 

“Humans. At least, it’s said. Later species moved in following trade, causing it to grow into the center of the Republic.” Ahsoka nods. “That question was easy. Give me a harder one!” She rolls her eyes and they continue for quite a while, Ahsoka asking questions and Lux answering them. Then she glances at the chrono on the wall.

“Oh no.” She jumps to her feet, fear coursing through her. If she doesn’t get going soon she’ll be late coming home. “I have to leave.” Lux gives her a concerned look.

“Why?” Ahsoka tosses her bag over her shoulder, putting some credits down on the counter to pay for their meal. 

“I told Habee I’d be home by six. It’s five thirty and I won’t make it home if I don’t get going soon.” Lux rises to his feet and follows her as she speeds out the door.

“Wait,” he says, following her down an alley. She doesn’t slow down. _What if he follows me and Habee sees?_ Panic starts rushing through her. Lux reaches out and grabs her arm. It’s not hard, his grip is gentle and light. But it’s enough to make Ahsoka cringe, pulling away from him. Her jacket slips, though, one empty sleeve dangling off her shoulder. Then he’s looking at the bruises on her arm, horror filling his gaze.

“I- I-” Ahsoka’s brain shuts down, sending her into panic mode. Tremblingly she pulls the fallen sleeve back on, leans back against the wall. The rational part of her knows it’s stupid, but she can’t help but feel like she’s waiting for him to hit her, or yell, or something. Instead he holds out a hand, moving slowly, like one might approach a wounded animal. Her chest heaves in and out, her breathing rapid. 

“You’ve been running away at the end of our meetings for the past two weeks. But I didn’t know-” He sounds worried, the concern on his features echoing Anakin and Obi-Wan. She looks at the hand, and reaches out and takes it. “Your arm- I- Do you want to-” And, as if in answer to the unspoken questions, Ahsoka bursts into tears. It’s stupid. It’s ugly. She pulls the hand she’s holding to her chest and, unexpectedly, Lux follows.

Carefully, ready to pull back immediately, he puts his other arm around her shoulders. Ahsoka abandons all pretenses and puts her head on his chest. He releases his grip on her hand and embraces her with both arms, seemingly unsure. They stay like that for a while. Long enough for her shoulders to stop trembling, for her breathing to slow. The feeling is warm and unfamiliar and comforting. And guilty. Gently, she pushes away from him. He grabs her hand and they walk down the alley, eventually dropping onto a pair of adjacent crates.

“Ahsoka,” Lux begins, and she knows where this is going. _He’s going to tell me I shouldn’t be with Habee, I shouldn’t let him treat me like that, that Habee’s an asshole._ All of those things are true, but Ahsoka’s not in the mood to hear them.

“I know.” Her voice is still rough from crying. “Okay? I know! Everyone tells me the same thing. Leave him! Find somewhere else! But I can’t.” Now she’s getting angry, but not at Lux, not at Habee. “I’m stuck. I’ve been dating Habee since I was thirteen. He wasn’t always like this! I remember in the old days, how he looked at me... he loved me. And sometimes he still does.” Her hands come to rest on her stomach. “I don’t have anywhere to go. He barely lets me have any friends, if I’m out late he gets angry, and I have to give him all my tip money at the end of the day.” She sighs, anger turning into sadness. “I’m stuck. Obi-Wan said I wasn’t, but I am.” 

“Ahsoka,” he repeats, “If he really loved you he wouldn’t do things like that.” She brings her gaze up and looks at Lux. There’s concern in his eyes, and anger. He looks at her, blue meeting brown. She reaches out again and takes his hand. “Love isn’t sometimes. It’s... a promise. You know it’ll be there when you get back.”

“I don’t know anymore.” The realization stabs at her heart. “I haven’t loved anyone in a long time. Not like that, anyway. Not since the first black eye two years ago.” Lux takes her other hand, and she tenses, staring into his eyes. _I haven’t loved anyone. But I want to._ And so, on a wild, dangerous impulse, she leans in and presses her lips to his. 

The kiss doesn’t last too long. Just a few moments. But there’s a warmth in her chest, his mouth against hers. A hand on her cheek, a hand in his hair. Eyes closed, the world being ignored, just for a moment. It’s not fireworks, it’s not nirvana, but it’s hers.

Ahsoka pulls away, waking from the dream. Lux says something, maybe her name, and she says something back, maybe his. Then, without her telling them to, her feet begin to run. Fast. Like her ancestors weaving through stripey grass. She runs until she can’t hear him anymore, until she can’t worry about anything other than breathing. Away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Do you ever have days where you feel like maybe you should’ve been a plumber or something?” -George R. R. Martin
> 
> (I’m fighting the writers block _hard _and I feel like everything I write is trash.) - Me on Wednesday__
> 
> Now we’re going to rewrite this. All of this! - Me on Thursday at 10:00
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed!
> 
> _  
> _Preliminary List of Songs I’m Skipping as Chapter Titles (due to irrelevancy or personal taste):__
> 
> _Never Ever Getting Rid of Me  
>  Bad Idea (reprise)  
> I Love You Like a Table  
> Dear Baby (not technically a song anyways, is included in the album for some reason)  
> Contraction Ballet  
> Opening Up (finale) ___  
>   
> 


	7. So Pure, So Electric

“Fuckin’ foreman.” Habee curses, buttoning up his jumpsuit. The plain, blue fabric is scratchy and slightly stained from use. Working on a freighter isn’t exactly light work. “Told him I wanted to be home for your next appointment. Dumbass tub of bantha fat told me that if I want to feed the kid when it gets here I’d better show up.” Ahsoka folds another shirt into his work bag.

“I appreciate the thought, honey.” He smiles at her, and she smiles back. Not wholeheartedly, though. Part of her heart got left behind in an alley down on Seela’s level. _I’m starting to suspect I’ll never get it back._ The news is blaring in the background. Progress updates on the war, a few escaped fugitives, some protests. Ahsoka turns to look at the picture. A well-dressed near-human is standing on the upper levels, the large senate building looming in the background.

_“Thank you. In section A246, a large group of dissidents are holding signs and chanting anti-war slogans. We’ve headed out here to get some answers.”_ She turns to a young Rodian, who’s sign reads **FIGHT FROM THE INSIDE OUT**. His expression is unreadable (for Ahsoka, anyway), but his tone suggests determination. _“So, what message are you trying to get out there?”_

_“Our message is pretty simple. There are people all over Coruscant and the rest of the core who don’t have the basics they need to survive. Power outages, poor education, unclean water; these problems are all too common.”_ Habee glances with disinterest at the holo and snorts as the protester continues. _“If the senate spent even 5% of the money they spend on the war on improving the lives of citizens, we could open schools and improve the infrastructure on the lower levels.”_

“Stupid bristle-brain. Thinks he’s going to change the galaxy by waving a piece of paper in front of some senator’s face.” Habee’s tone is bitter. “The upper levelers don’t give a flying blaster bolt about us, and that’s a fact.” Ahsoka’s only half listening to him, though, because the reporter has turned to another protester. One with brown hair and eyes. One who’s voice is smooth and beautiful. One who she knows. Quickly, before her face can give anything away, Ahsoka switches off the program. Habee gives her a strange look but says nothing. _Thank the stars for little miricles._

* * *

Ahsoka wipes the table down with a wet cloth, then dries it with dry one. The monotony of the day is only underlined by the fact that she doesn’t have any plans for after work. _Maybe I’ll play cards with Obi-Wan again?_ If she hadn’t messed everything up by kissing Lux in the alley, it would be a perfect opportunity to spend time with him. 

She turns around, nearly running into Obi-Wan and a group of Twi’leks he’s trying to seat. _I can slip out of the way now, but what am I going to do in two months when my stomach’s taking up half the diner?_ She frowns and goes to the back to check on her pies. They’re rather depressing this week, but it is what it is. Halfway through wiping down the counter, there’s a light tap on her shoulder.

“You can’t avoid me forever.” Ahsoka sighs.

“Listen up, Skyguy, I’m not avoiding you. Actually-” She pauses, having finished wiping things up and in the middle of pulling out a lump of cookie dough from the fridge. “Wait, did you leave Obi-Wan out there by himself?”

“We’re in the middle of the 3:00 slump, I’m sure he’ll be fine.” Without seeing his face, Ahsoka knows he’s grinning. “Now you have an incentive to talk to me so I’ll go away!” She slams the cookie dough down on the counter and turns to face him.

“Well? I’m here. Talk.” The look on his face is almost hurt, but she doesn’t feel bad in the slightest.

“I’m worried about you.” Anakin is totally serious now, and that’s rare. Some of her anger evaporates. “You’ve been moping around the diner for two weeks now. So what’s going on? Is Habee hurting you? Is the baby alright? That Lux kid giving you a hard time?” He’s worried about her, and Ahsoka hates it when people are worried about her.

“I’m fine, Anakin, really. I’m just, uh, tired. And I’ve been thinking a lot. About what Obi-Wan said, and all this other stuff.” It’s not totally a lie. Not a big one, anyways. Anakin remains serious. He knows it’s not the whole truth. The scar that stretches over his eye, the one he won’t tell her about, is pulled taut by a frown. Then he relaxes and lets it go. 

“If you ever need help I’m here.” He takes a deep breath. “And when you leave Habee,” and, at her doubtful glances, he adds, “That’s when, Snips, not if; I’ll be there for you. And if that means I have to punch that jackass in the brain-tails, so be it.” She smiles a little, in spite of herself, and wraps her arms around him. He hangs back for a moment, startled, but then hugs her back.

“You’re the best.” He smiles.

“What else would I be?” She punches him in the shoulder. He backs away a little and grins. “This isn’t over, by the way. You still have to talk to me about mystery alley guy.” She rolls her eyes.

“You better go help Obi-Wan now.” He rolls his eyes, steals a pinch of cookie dough, and heads from the room. “You just broke two food safety laws!” She calls, but he’s already out the door. 

That conversation sticks with Ahsoka for a long while. When she gets home and goes to put her tip money in the little jar in the kitchen, she hesitates. _If I put it in here, Habee will spend it on beer._ Three credits remain in her hand. She drops two in, then tightens her hold on the last one and turns away. 

She searches a while for a good hiding spot. _Not under the couch cushions. Not under the mattress. Not inside my makeup._ She’s brought back to the first year on Coruscant, when Habee started drinking and they got behind on rent. Work at the diner had just started, and she was trying to save every little bit she could. All of the failed hiding places come back to her, the night Habee found money behind a box of crackers. Remembered better is the harsh punishment after.

_That’ll teach you to lie to me._ The harsh words echo over time. Ahsoka walks back to the tip jar. _It’s not worth it. I shouldn’t lie to him_. It would be so easy to just drop the credit into the jar and forget about it. _Then again, I’ve been lying to him a lot lately._ She steps away from the tip jar and, finally, heads back to the bedroom. She opens the dresser. The top drawer has Habee’s clothes, books from when he used to read, and a few odds and ends. The middle drawer has her clothes, her knife, and a small box of her things from Shili. Which isn’t quite home anymore, either. Then she sees it.

A box of condoms. Which Habee has started several thousand arguments about using. Sometimes Ahsoka would cave, sometimes she wouldn’t. Sometimes there wasn’t a choice. Now that she’s already pregnant, there isn’t much of a point. Or maybe there is. It depends on whether or not Habee is fucking random women at space ports during cargo runs. In any case, there is no danger of Habee opening this box himself. So she slips the single credit inside, among the condoms.

It’s actually kind of funny, when she thinks about it, so she ends up on the floor laughing alone in a semi-darkened room. _If anyone else was here they’d think I went insane._ She lends the little box one more glance before sliding the drawer shut. One credit. The condoms themselves cost more than that. Even one little credit feels like a big step, though.

A step away from Habee.

* * *

Ahsoka almost screams when she sees him. Out of surprise, not fear. Lux is back in his under-world clothes, loitering around back of Dex’s, clearly waiting for something. For her. She ducks back inside for a moment, heart racing. _Thank god he didn’t see me._ Then she realizes that unless she wants to explain to Obi-Wan and, worse, Anakin, why she’s leaving through the front, she still has to walk past him. So, she straightens her bag, takes a deep breath, and steps out into the alleyway. 

As soon as he sees her Lux stops his idle pacing. They regard each other for a moment, warily, waiting for something to happen. As much as it shouldn’t, her heart leaps at the sight of him. It’s been two weeks, and she’s missed him. But she shouldn’t. And she told herself that she was going to let this go. End it. Finally, he speaks.

“Listen, I know what happened last time. And it was bad. Well, it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t _right_ either, and I know things got a little weird there, but-” Lux pauses for a moment, takes a deep breath, and continues. “I miss you.” Ahsoka looks at him, and the warm, tingly feeling in her stomach grows. “I understand if you don’t want to talk to me anymore, or even see me again, but I felt terrible. I didn’t know how you were, or if you made it home alright, and-” Ahsoka walks over to him and puts a hand on his shoulder. His rambling speech trails off.

“Can we talk somewhere else?” Obi-Wan or Anakin could pop out at any moment. Or one of Habee’s weird friends could see them and tell on her. Lux looks visibly relieved.

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.” They walk a little further apart than usual to the transports, silent. The absence of conversation is louder than the drone of the street. She leads him on the familiar route home, and then unlocks the apartment with her key card. He looks around with interest. “Is this where you live?” She hangs her bag on a hook and looks at the ground self-consciously.

“Yeah.” They fall silent, the ghost of tension falling thick in the air between them. Ahsoka is half-expecting Habee to pop out and scream at her. She gestures to the chipped table with its mismatched chairs. “Sit?” And they do, sitting across from each other and avoiding eye contact. Ahsoka picks at the tabletop, trying to find the words to say. What comes out is, “Habee isn’t here.”

“That’s good to know.” He sounds a little strained, and Ahsoka remembers the last time they met it was when he discovered the bruises Habee left on her arms. “I guess there’s not a good way to start this, is there?” Ahsoka sighs and finally meets his eyes.

“No, not really.” Her fingers scrabble over the plastoid. “So... we kissed.” Lux laughs a little, and that helps to cut the tension. 

“I guess that’s the root of the problem.” Ahsoka has noticed that when he’s nervous he runs his hand through his hair more often. It’s very cute, and the ruffled up look it gives is very hot. “We should probably not do that again, right?” She bites her lip and looks down at the table.

“That’s what I _should_ say. I mean, I’m dating a guy. Kissing people who aren’t him isn’t right.” She sighs. “But I want to kiss you, and that’s the problem. I thought I could just be your friend and ignore it, but that didn’t work and now...” She makes a vague, sweeping gesture. “Well, we’re here.” 

“Being just friends was a little difficult for me, too.” Somehow, this surprises her. 

“It was? I thought...” A bit of fire leaps into his eyes.

“Thought what? Ever since I first met you I thought you were really pretty. And you’re also nice, and funny, and you have so much... spirit.” _Spirit? Me?_ He’s looking into her soul now, and she’s looking right back into his. “Everyone else in the Junior Legislature, all my parent’s friends, anyone I’ve ever met has been lying to me. And I lie right back. It’s how politics work; if you tell people who you really are they’ll dig their claws in and use you to maneuver themselves a little higher. But I can talk to you. About anything. And you don’t use it to hurt me. You listen.” 

“You make me sound so amazing.” Ahsoka shakes her head. “I’m not special, I’m just a stupid girl who’s stuck herself with a shitty boyfriend. You’re passionate. Your an upper leveler who’s actually doing something to make a difference. You’re smart and your hair is beatiful and- Stars!” She gets to her feet and grabs Lux’s hands, pulling him up beside her. “I meant what I said in that alley. I don’t know how to love anymore.” Her hands move to his cheeks, and his breathing increases. She keeps her grip light, ready to pull away at any second. But he doesn’t move.

“Ahsoka.” Lux’s face is centimeters from her own, his breath hitting her face in soft puffs. It’s the first time she’s been this close to someone who doesn’t smell like liquor in so long she’s almost giddy with it. “This is a bad idea.” She puts her head on his chest. _Why do I fit so perfectly? His chin would slide right between my montrals!_

“Yeah. I know.” Ahsoka sighs. “You’re Lux Bonteri.” 

“You’re a twilighter.” She smiles.

“You work at the clinic I go to.”

“You have a boyfriend.”

“I’m pregnant.” Ahsoka laughs and lifts her head, looking up into Lux’s eyes. “This definitely won’t end well.” She presses her lips against his in a kiss, deeper and more aggressive than the one they shared in the alley. To her delight, he pulls her closer, tilting his head and trying to find purchase underneath her rear lek. Heat sears her chest, raw and wanting. _I haven’t kissed like this in so long._ They break apart after several wonderful moments, breathing hard.

“A terrible proposal.” Lux’s hand is moving slowly up underneath the back of her shirt, and instead of the sick dread that this action usually inspires, it’s a clean passion. Heat. Fire. Ahsoka begins to slide her own hand under his shirt. He stops for a moment, pulls back. “Are you sure?” His brown eyes are truly sincere, and her heart feels so incredibly full that someone’s _asking,_ stars _, finally_. Everything about this moment feels so perfect. _Is this l_ _ove?_ She grabs his other hand and presses it to her chest.

“Couldn’t be more.” And then their lips crash together and she gives into the flames.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update; I couldn’t write this, like, at all. Even the title was dragged out of me, and the title is freaking song lyrics that were already written.
> 
> Now that my excuses are over, thank you for reading! Regularly scheduled update this Friday.


	8. Already Pretty Bad

Anakin gives Ahsoka a suspicious look over his hand of cards. Obi-Wan has his held up too high for her to figure out what he’s thinking, but he seems to be smiling. For her own part she looks down at the table, unwilling to answer Anakin’s question. 

_So what’s up with the mysterious alley kid?_

The answer to that question is far more complicated than she cares to explain, especially to her almost-brother and almost-dad over a game of cards. Though Obi-Wan was the one who decided to give her the condom talk _while trying to convince her to take a pregnancy test._ And Anakin picked the middle of her shift to talk about her feelings. _My entire life is just bad-timing these days, huh?_

_What would I even tell him if I wanted to explain it? Oh yeah, his name’s Lux. He’s a politician who I’m friends with. And after work a few days ago I brought him over to my apartment to talk about why we shouldn’t kiss each other and ended up fucking him on my kitchen table._ On top of the obvious, she still feels a little guilty for cheating on Habee. The two men sitting across from her probably wouldn’t judge her, but she doesn’t want to tell them about it.

“Judging by your non-response it’s either really good or really bad.” Ahsoka can’t help but laugh. 

“Is it possible for it to be both?” Now Anakin looks even more suspicious. He puts his cards down and leans forward, a move that might’ve been intimidating if it wasn’t for the fact that they’re playing in a well-lit kitchen. 

“Come on, Snips. Spill. Who is he?” A grin breaks through his intimidating facade. “What is he? Where is he? Why is he?” Ahsoka rolls her eyes and tosses her own cards down on the table. Obi-Wan sighs and does the same. 

“Do you two remember the days when we actually played sabacc instead of just talking?” Anakin shoots him a grin. 

“No.” He turns back to Ahsoka. “Tell us! I’m sure Obi-Wan wants to know too, right?” The older man shakes his head and says nothing, sitting back and folding his arms with a sigh. Ahsoka squirms under Anakin’s scrutinizing gaze.

“He’s just some guy I met. We’re friends. Sometimes I hang out with him after work.” She turns to Obi-Wan now. “Obi-Wan was there when I was hanging out with him that one time, remember?” He rolls his eyes.

“There’s something you’re missing from your summary of your friend.” She raises an eyebrow casually, but inside her stomach churns. _Can he know?_ “He happens to be the son of the Onderonian senator.” Anakin pivots his attention to her and stares. 

“Snips-” there’s a warning tone in his voice that means a lecture’s on the way, but before he can say anything else Ahsoka cuts him off.

“I told him,” and here, she gestures to Obi-Wan, “and now I’m telling you. We. Are. Not. Dating. He knows I have a boyfriend, and I’m getting obviously pregnant by now if I hadn’t told him before. We are friends. We talk to each other. We visit questionable restaurants in the lower levels. There is nothing wrong with being friends with him.” Anakin crosses his arms and sighs.

“I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with you being friends,” he says, in a tone that suggests very much the opposite, “but I don’t want you to get hurt. If Habee found out...” He trails off. 

“You don’t have to tell me that, Anakin. I know. It’s dangerous, and stupid, and a bad idea, but I don’t care!” Her voice rises steadily. “I’ve been doing exactly what Habee’s told me to do for so long... just having one friend can’t hurt. You don’t even know what it’s like, to be stuck like that.” Anakin’s face tightens, and Ahsoka winces internally. _That was too far._ But there’s more to it than simple hurt. In a calm, even tone, he says,

“Ahsoka, there’s something I’ve never told you before. And it’s about my mom.” He takes a deep breath, and Ahsoka catches Obi-Wan looking at him worriedly. “I grew up in the outer rim on a planet called Tatooine. My mother and I were both slaves. Our master was a slimy junk dealer named Watto. He didn’t like us, but I don’t think he liked anyone. And whenever we messed up, he’d beat us. Sometimes very badly.” Shock and horror course through her stomach. Everything she just said feels awful and gross and horrifying, and she wants to take it back more than anything in the universe. But she can’t. And Anakin’s not done.

“I don’t want you to feel bad for me. That’s not why I’m telling you this. I just want you to know, I know how it feels to take risks and walk the edge of the cliff.” Then he sighs. “I also know how it feels to fall. When I was nine my dream was to win a pod race. I was taking old junk parts whenever I could to build my own racer. Watto found out. He was already angry that day, and he took it out on me. I very nearly died.” Anakin looks back up at her, and she finds it hard to meet his eyes. “I told him it wasn’t mine. He didn’t care. And I know for a fact that you and this Lux kid are way more than just friends.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She wraps her arms around herself. “Lux and I-” The look on his face stops her dead. He knows. 

“Habee left four days ago. You showed up to work with a bruise on your neck three days ago. That’s my solid proof.” His face softens a little. “But I could’ve told you from the second I saw him looking at you in that alleyway that something was going on there.” Ahsoka sighs and looks down at the table.

“I think I might love him.” Her sentence is met by silence. Then, a hand on her shoulder. It’s Obi-Wan’s.

“We’re not going to stop you. That’s obvious.” His voice is gentle. “We’re trying to ask you to be more careful.” For a moment she can almost feel the immense worry that they have for her, and she wants to cry because it’s so selfless and honest and maybe she does cry a little. Ahsoka hugs them both, and they hug back. 

* * *

When she gets home from work now she immediately pulls one credit form the bunch and puts it away in her condom box. It’s been six days. Six days, six credits. Today, however, she isn’t going straight home. She’s got her six month checkup at the free clinic. _Weird to think it’s been three months already_. Time has been simultaneously slow and fast. This also reminds her that she’s over halfway done with her pregnancy. In three months she’ll giving birth. That’s practically no time at all.

_Maybe I should start saving two credits?_ Ahsoka muses as she walks the familiar route to level 57. She can’t keep up her train of thought for long, though. She and Lux haven’t spoken since the apartment incident. Mentally, she chides herself for coming up with such a stupid name for it. _You’re pregnant, for stars’s sake, you’re a big girl. You can say ‘since we had sex’_. But she still feels a little guilty about that. So she tries not to think about it and ends up thinking of little else. 

She has to wait a little longer than usual in the waiting room, but that’s alright. Lux doesn’t work in the waiting room, so there’s little danger of him walking into her here. Ahsoka fidgets with her bag a little, remembers the strap breaking, then stops. Finally, after around three million tense years, she gets brought back and put in a little curtained stall.

The old, rumbly medical droid trundles in right on time. It’s looking even more rickety than usual, and she’s strangely hesitant to trust it with the checkup. As she’s come to expect it takes her blood, does some sort of scan on her abdomen, and monitors her vital signs. Unusually, it beeps during the strange scan.

“Is everything okay?” she asks, concerned. The medical droid withdraws its scanner.

“Yes, everything is quite alright. The infant has simply moved since our last appointment and I can now determine the gender, if you would like to know.” Ahsoka looks at it for a few moments, placing a hand on her belly instinctively. _Do I want to know?_ She hesitates. _You’d better be a boy._

“No, I’d like it to be a surprise.” The medical droid whirs, gives her a few reminders not to drink caf or alcohol, and for some strange reason, to eat plenty of bone marrow. Before she can ask, it rolls out without saying goodbye. Ahsoka is left staring at it for a moment, then climbs off the exam table and grabs her bag from the spindly chair nearby. 

The curtain gets pushed aside, and for a second she thinks the droid has come back to explain the bone marrow comment, but when she turns around it’s not the familiar box-on-wheels. It’s Lux. _Of course it is._ He’s holdiing a spray bottle of disinfectant and a rag, and when he meets her eyes he blushes and looks away. She pulls her bag onto her shoulder and walks up to him uncertainly.

“Hi.” _There is no way in hell I’m going to let him make things awkward again._ He still has a hard time meeting her eyes.

“Hi.” She crosses her arms.

“You’re very talkative today.” He sighs and walks past her to the table. Something inside of her pulls a little. _I thought that we..._ Lux begins spraying it down. She doesn’t leave. “Hey. I know you’re working, but it’d be nice if you would acknowledge me a little.” He remains silent. Ahsoka sighs and turns to leave, then pauses in the doorway. “Goodbye, then.” But before she can get far, he’s grabbing her arm. She flinches out of his grip.

“We need to talk. My supervisor’s breathing down my neck. I go on break in five minutes. Can you please wait out back?” He meets her eyes for the first time, and the worry in them makes her reconsider. She sighs, then nods. 

“Fine.” The next five minutes are pure agony. A torrent of feelings rush through her, chiefly worry and confusion. _What if he doesn’t want to talk to me very again?_ Then the back door of the clinic opens and someone is holding her in their arms, and it takes her a minute to realize it’s Lux.

Apparently, Ahsoka was right in her assumption that his chin would fit right between her montrals because that’s exactly what happens. She hesitates for a few seconds, then hugs him back.

“Um, Lux?” He lets her go a little and looks in her eyes.

“I’m sorry. My supervisor found out we’re friends and she got a little pissy with me. She’s actually the one who told me to scrub down that room, and so I think she knew and wanted me to be professional, and I didn’t really know what to do, but-” Ahsoka cuts him off with a kiss. When they break apart she gives him a sheepish grin.

“Sorry. I guess this means that you still want to talk to me?” He smiles back.

“Yes. Among other things.” Then he panics a little. “Unless you don’t want to do other things, because even though _I_ had a good time- well, that’s a stupid way of putting it but anyways, I understand completely if you want to-” Ahsoka laughs at him.

“You talk too much.” She squeezes his hand. “For the record, yes I ‘had a good time’. First time in a while that I’ve been with someone who actually cared. I still want to talk to you, too.” He pulls her back in for another hug, and she realizes that he was kind of scared as well. She smiles into the embrace. They’re kept a few inches apart by her stomach, but that’s not the end of the world. A small blip flutters through her abdomen. Lux pulls back suddenly and looks down at her, surprised.

“What was that?” She gives him a strange look. Then she catches on to what he means. 

“Oh, I didn’t realize you could feel that. It’s the baby, I think. Kicking.” He smiles, and it’s not the relived smile of before but on of genuine happiness. He puts a hand on her stomach. His touch is light and gentle. _So different from Habee._ She’s not worried about Lux punching her in the gut. _I guess that makes all the difference._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’d like to give a shoutout to my best friend L, who’s had a bad week. She’s awesome and listens to me ramble about writing, so go her!
> 
> Why do I keep ending these so fluffily? There’s not enough angst! I just write and words come out, though. That’s discovery writing for you.
> 
> Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	9. A Road You Never Thought You’d See

It’s another boring day. Well, not quite so boring. Habee had arrived late yesterday and has been sleeping off hyperspace all day. Ahsoka knows he’ll be up when she gets home. He’ll want her tip money, and also probably sex. She’s not quite sure how to react to either request. _Should I leave the other two credits in my bag and hide them later?_ Habee might notice something off no matter what she does. And, even though it’s impossible, even though they’ve been especially careful about leaving marks on her body, she’s convinced that the second Habee gets her shirt off he’ll know something’s wrong. 

She sweeps one credit off of the corner booth and grabs the dishes to take back to the kitchen. A quick sweep of the restaurant reveals a new customer over by the window. Once she’s put the plates down in the sink she leans backwards and sighs. Recently, her back and legs have been starting to hurt around mid-day. It’s a massive pain in the ass, and it also means she’s a little slower than usual. Outside of her own body, people have been starting to look at her funny. Before they might’ve written it off as a teenager’s pudge, but now Ahsoka’s obviously pregnant.

Back to the dining area. The customer over the window is the Kel-Dor Jedi, his companion conspicuously absent. _Why am I always the one serving when the Jedi show up? I just might have taken Anakin up on his offer today._ Unfortunately, Anakin’s taken the day off for some mysterious reason. Though the last time she saw Anakin and the lady Jedi together, Anakin was obviously flirting with her. _I really need to talk to him about that._ The thought makes her grin. _He digs into my love life, I’ll dig into his._

“Hello, sir. What can I get you today?” The Kel-Dor looks up at her. 

“Unfortunately, my companion isn’t here yet and I cannot eat outside of pressurized rooms.” Ahsoka shuffles her feet, unsure of what she’s supposed to do with this information.

“Do you want me to come back once she gets here, then?” The goggle-covered stare is really starting to creep her out. Probably unintentionally, but still. 

“Actually, I would like to speak with you.” _What? Why?_ He must catch onto her uncertainty, because he adds, “Concerning your future.” She fiddles with the notepad in her hands.

“Okay...” 

“Not right here. Perhaps we could meet after your shift is finished?” Habee runs through her mind. 

“I really need to get home right after work, so..” 

“It would not take long.” _Well, you have to give him points for persistence._ Ahsoka sighs and nods.

“Alright. I get off around five-thirty.” And for the rest of the day, all thoughts of Habee and Lux and tips are driven out of her mind by the mysterious meeting she’s set up with a Jedi later. All she’s ever heard about Jedi is that they’re warriors who can lift things with their minds. So why one wants to speak to Ahsoka privately is completely beyond her. 

When she steps out into the street after work, she looks around and spots the Kel-Dor loitering in the shadows. Hesitantly, she steps towards him. _What am I supposed to say?_

“Um, hello?” He steps away from the duracrete wall and stands in front of her. He’s several inches taller than her and quite intimidating. Include the nearly expressionless face and you’ve got something more akin to a nightmare than a brave warrior.

“Let’s walk.” And there’s little choice but to follow. They go in silence for a moment, leaving the crowded street that Dex’s is on and walking down some side roads. If it weren’t for the fact that the Kel-Dor is a Jedi, she’d probably be worried about him murdering her. “I’m assuming you know who I am?” She nods.

“A Jedi.” The Kel-Dor nods back.

“My name is Plo-Koon. My former Padawan tells me that you are Ahsoka Tano?” _His former Padawan? I’ve never talked to a Jedi outside of the two that come to the diner!_

“Yes? I don’t know any Padawans, though.” She has a feeling that behind the strange breathing mask, Plo-Koon is smiling. 

“Padmé Naberrie. She’s the one who insists on coming to that diner for breakfast. Apparently your blonde friend with the scar has told her about you and the older one.” _Anakin!_ It makes sense, though. That boy couldn’t hold information back if the fate of the galaxy depended on it. _I was right. They are up to something!_

“Ah.” They take a few more paces, falling into silence. This time, she breaks it. “No offense, but why do you want to talk to me? You’re a Jedi. You do things like hunt down criminals and lead the clones in battle. What do you want with a random teenager living in the twilight zone?” He pauses before he answers.

“Usually we don’t approach people like this, but due to the nature of your circumstances I thought this to be the best course of action.” Another pause. _Really knows how to get to the point, huh?_ “Since we started coming to that diner a few years ago, I noticed something odd about the waitstaff. All three of you are strong in the Force.” _What?_

“I don’t understand.”

“That means that in other circumstances, you could’ve become Jedi. In fact, your older friend- but that’s not my story to tell.” _Obi-Wan? And also, JEDI? Anakin as a Jedi?_ She tries to imagine her easygoing friend as one of the wise, robe-wearing warriors. It’s very difficult. _Or me..._ “In any case, Force sensitivity is hereditary. Usually, people strong in it will have children strong in it.” Ahsoka’s hands fly to her stomach.

“My baby.” Plo-Koon nods.

“I can feel it. Feeling the Force sensitivity of the unborn is always a difficult task, but I am almost certain that your child will have the power. As I said before, Jedi do not usually approach parents before their children are born, but Padmé has told me about your circumstances. Your friend is apparently quite worried about you. If I am correct, and it is your wish, we can take your child and train them as a Jedi.” Her head is spinning. _Give up my baby?_ This would solve all of her problems. She could sleep on Obi-Wan and Anakin’s couch, work up for enough money to get her own place, and finally put Habee behind her. But... 

She’d never see her baby again. The Jedi don’t allow families. The little Togruta would never know her, or Shili, or... Ahsoka looks up to find the Kel-Dor looking at her. Apparently, she’s stopped walking. When he continues speaking, his tone is more gentle.

“You don’t have to decide right now. Even after your child is born, you’ll have a few months to decide. And, as I said, I could be wrong in my assessment of their abilities.” She sighs.

“Thank you for telling me all this.” He nods.

“I won’t keep you any longer. Goodbye, Ahsoka.” And then she’s left alone down a random side street with only her thoughts.

* * *

“Obi-Wan, do you know that Kel-Dor that comes in all the time?” The older man pauses in opening the crate of foodstuffs, looking up at her.

“What about him?” Ahsoka shifts around uncomfortably, pulling a box of napkins from her own plastoid box.

“Well, he talked to me yesterday after work. First of all, he’s definitely a Jedi. His name is Plo-Koon.” A flicker of recognition flashes in Obi-Wan’s eyes. “Second of all, he told me that you, Anakin, and I are strong in the Force.” She takes a deep breath, gathers up her courage, then continues, “And he started to say something about you, but then said that it wasn’t his business. So I was just wondering if you knew what he was talking about.” 

Obi-Wan is silent for a moment, still halfway between opening the box and taking the lid off. She thinks he might be angry, but he doesn’t seem angry. Not even upset, really. Maybe... surprised? Finally, he sighs and looks up at her.

“What did Master Plo want to speak to you about?” _Master Plo?_ Jedi call their superiors ‘master’, Ahsoka knows. Now, looking at her often-calm older friend, she imagines him in that role. It fits him startlingly well. She’s about to ask him again, tell him to not change the subject, but then she realizes that maybe he doesn’t want to talk about it.

“He... wanted to ask me...” Ahsoka takes a breath, then sighs it back out. “If I would give my baby to the Jedi when the time came.” Obi-Wan is now regarding her with the same strange look he had when she mentioned the Kel-Dor’s name.

“Will you?” Ahsoka sits down on the stack of crates, abandoning all pretense of work. For once, she just wants to be honest with someone. So that’s what she does.

“I’m thinking about it.” He looks at her seriously, and there’s now a strange blend of emotions in his eyes that she can’t comprehend. They’re silent for a few minutes, thinking in the supply room. Ahsoka breaks the silence this time. “What’s it like?” For a second she doesn’t think he’s going to answer. Then:

“There’s not one good word to sum it all up. But... I always had a purpose. I knew who I was and what I was doing. As a youngling, anyway. The order was my family and when I fell someone was there to pick me up.” He sighs. “I knew Satine before I ran into her and the pirates in that alley, you know. My master and I were assigned to protect her when I was a few years older than you. We thought we were in love. I left my order for her. And then we found out that we didn’t fit. I ended up here eventually, found Anakin. Now her, again, and we seem to be getting along better.” Lots is left unsaid.

“Anakin doesn’t know, does he?” Obi-Wan shakes his head. 

“He doesn’t have a clue.” He looks at Ahsoka again, and she feels like he has a lot to say but no words to say it in. “I wouldn’t change any of it, you know. The Jedi taught me a lot. Then Satine, then Anakin. Then you.” He smiles for the first time since their conversation began, a small smile but a visible one. “I can’t tell you what you should do. I can’t make any promises. But I’ll help you however I can.” Ahsoka smiles at him, then grows sober.

“I won’t tell Anakin. Not if you don’t want me to.” Obi-Wan nods.

“Despite the fact that he’s currently running around with a Jedi, I don’t think he’s ready to hear that I was sort-of one.”

* * *

“Is every diner on the lower levels this interesting?” Lux asks with a smile. Ahsoka squeezes his hand.

“Only the one.” He grins.

“What I want to know is what Dex’s big secret it. A love of the opera? A secret rivalry with the tap-cafe down the street?” Lux presses a quick kiss to her right montral. “I know! He’s a separatist spy taking down the Republic from the inside.” Her stomach is feeling warm and bubbly. Just walking down a street with Lux is enough to de-stress her a little. She still hasn’t told him about Obi-Wan’s secret. She’s with the Kel-Dor on this one, that’s private. Anakin obviously screwing around with a Jedi, however, is fair game. 

Just as she’s about to suggest another weird secret for Dex, she suddenly finds herself being pushed into an alleyway. At first she’s panicking, convinced Habee has finally found out and is about to kill her. She flattens herself against the wall, then realizes that Lux is the one doing the shoving.

“Is everything okay?” she asks. The tall boy scans the throngs of people moving past. She reaches for his hand but he lets his hand slip right through her fingers. He’s tense for a few minutes, then relaxes and turns back to her.

“I’m sorry,” he says, “I just... thought I saw...” Ahsoka shakes her head and grabs his hand. To her delight, he grabs back this time, lifting a weight off her chest. It makes her feel stupid and pitiful, but she can’t help but crave his reciprocation.

“It’s fine. Let’s just keep going.” Lux smiles, but even as they walk down the street he feels far away and quiet, looking down every side road with caution. _If there’s ever a time I wish I could read minds..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens...


	10. I Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written with the power of Season 4, Ep 11 of Rebels. Agh!

_I guess there is some sort of karma after all_ , Ahsoka notes, rubbing her sore back. _Habee leaves for a week and I get raging back pain._ However, her luck isn’t that bad. A plan to meet up with Lux after work, sixty-seven credits hidden in the apartment, and no suspicion from Habee about any of it. It almost makes up for the other weird realizations she’s been stumbling into these past few weeks. 

She does one last check of the prep area, switches on the cleaning droids, then steps out into the back alleyway. Instead of finding a dressed-down Lux, one of her coworkers, or even a mysterious Kel Dor, she walks out onto the shocking scene of Anakin kissing... someone. Passionately. What follows is a silent but furious debate about what to do, resolving with a retreat into the back door. Unfortunately, Obi-Wan’s attempting to walk out right behind her.

“What’s going on- Oh!” He seems to realize what’s going on right as Anakin notices their presence. The blonde man breaks apart from his partner, who, Ahsoka triumphantly notes, is the Jedi who visits regularly. They both stare at Ahsoka and Obi-Wan with the appropriate level of embarrassment. Obi-Wan crosses his arms in the doorway. 

“Um,” Anakin looks like he’s racing to make up an excellent excuse when Obi-Wan gives him _that_ look. His face deflates. “Hi.” He turns to his flushed Jedi companion. “Er, I guess this is a bad time to mention I’ve gotten myself a girlfriend?” Ahsoka snorts.

“ _I’ve_ known something was up for months, Skyguy. I told you, you couldn’t keep a secret to save the galaxy.” Anakin rolls his eyes.

“Of _course_ you knew for months. I left so much evidence lying around.” She blinks at him.

“You disappeared from the front every time that pair showed up at the restaurant and the lady disappeared to the refresher.” Ahsoka taps her fingers as she lists the incidents. “You offered to take over their table a couple of times. You were conspicuously absent from work the same day the Kel Dor came in alone. Also, the Kel Dor actually told me that you,” and here she gestures to the lady Jedi, “have been talking to Anakin. So yeah, I’ve got lots of evidence.” 

“She’s got you there, Ani.” The lady Jedi says, laughing. He gives her a semi-embarrassed smile. Then he turns back to Ahsoka and Obi-Wan.

“So... this is Padmé. Padmé, this is Obi-Wan and Snips.” Padmé smiles at them. Ahsoka studies her. Her eyes are calm and her smile is genuine. Anakin sure seems to like her. But what really causes her to like the woman is the look she has on her face when she turns back to Anakin. It’s sappy, pure, genuine affection. Doesn’t get much better than that.

“Nice to meet you, Padmé,” Ahsoka says, eyeing the entrance to the alleyway, “but I’ve got to get going.” Anakin grins at her.

“So are you off to meet _your_ secret boyfriend?” Her lekku curl a little.

“He’s not my boyfriend! He’s-” _What is Lux exactly?_ “well, he’s not my boyfriend!” He laughs, but his tone gentles.

“Go ahead, Snips. Don’t keep your _friend_ waiting.” Ahsoka rolls her eyes, straightens her bag strap, and is about to head for the entrance of the alley when Lux pokes his head around the corner. “Ah! Speak of the bantha.” He makes eye contact with Ahsoka, confused. She shrugs. Anakin turns to look at him. “Well, don’t just stand there. I’ve just introduced everyone to my girlfriend, it’s the perfect opportunity for us to meet Ahsoka’s new... _friend_.” _Would it kill him to be subtle for once?_ Lux blushes and hesitantly starts down the alley towards them. 

“Hello,” he says cautiously, clearly afraid to pass Anakin and Padmé, who are still half-embracing. Obi-Wan stands in the doorway, arms crossed, expression unreadable. Ahsoka beckons him from the other side of the doorframe and he comes to stand next to her. She wants to take his hand or maybe kiss him, but both of his hands are in his pockets and he looks like a small, furry creature that’s been cornered.

“I think you’ve met everyone but Padmé.” Ahsoka says instead, gesturing to the dark-haired woman. She smiles at Lux encouragingly, which he returns with less enthusiasm. Ahsoka turns to him and says quietly, “I know they’re a lot.” He shrugs again. _Okay_. 

“We should probably get going,” he says, eyes cast at the pavement. _He’s easily intimidated for a politician._ Still, Ahsoka says her goodbyes and follows Lux from the alley and down a few streets. Silently.

“Are you okay?” she asks, folding her arms across her chest. That’s been getting more difficult lately due to her ever-expanding abdomen. He sighs.

“I’m fine.” 

“And also lying.” For the first time since his hesitation at the start of the alley, he looks up at her, his blue eyes steady. There’s another expression she can’t quite place on his face.

“I’m not lying. I just... had a hard day.” _That’s what people say when they’re not fine._ Well, if he doesn’t want to talk about it, Ahsoka doesn’t feel like making him. They continue along the way, heading for the transport station. “Do you ever feel like you’re making the wrong choice?” She glances over at him.

“Is this about us, or something else?” He sighs.

“I’m in a tough spot. I just- how do you know if you’re making the right decisions?” Ahsoka waits for him to elaborate, but he doesn’t. She frowns, joining him in studying the ground.

“Sometimes I ask Obi-Wan or Anakin. Sometimes I look at what the people around me are doing.” Ahsoka pauses. _Should he really be taking advice from me, of all people?_ “And sometimes I just have to trust myself.” Lux reaches out and- _finally_ -grabs her hand. She smiles at him, and he squeezes it.

“Thank you.” 

“Well, if I didn’t go around spitting out wisdom what _would_ I be doing?” This cracks a smile onto his solemn face. “So, where’re we heading?” 

“Towards the upper levels. I had an idea.” The smile on his face doesn’t dim, and she squeezes his hand back. 

“Lead the way.”

* * *

“A library?” she asks, surprised. They don’t have those on the lower levels, and they definitely didn’t have them where she lived on Shili. The smile on Lux’s face wavers then strengthens. _I really wish I knew what was bothering him._ He’s not going to talk about it, though, at least not more than they already have. That’s something she’s learned about him.

“I thought you’d like it here. I know how much you love reading.” She squeezes his hand, then lets go to walk among the shelves. All of the books are digitized holonovels, thin panes of electronics containing a wealth of information. Ahsoka’s not one to see beauty in droid parts like Anakin, or in the rhythm of the city like Obi-Wan. Plants and landscapes catch her eye; the little creepers growing up the walls from a smudge of earth are one of her favorite parts of Coruscant. But here, looking at the sleek, glittering holonovels, she’s started seeing things from Anakin’s point of view.

“Excuse me.” The tone is disdainful. She turns around to find a thin, well-dressed woman glaring at her. Ahsoka knows her type. Leaves tiny tips, spills her drink and doesn’t clean it up, complains about everything. She reverts to customer service tone.

“Is there a problem, ma’am?” The woman’s purple-colored lips twist into an even more disdainful expression. Ahsoka hopes that’s not her natural color. It does _not_ work for her.

“Are you aware of what level you’re on?” Ahsoka’s lekku curl. 

“This is a public library, _ma’am_.” she says, “and I have every right to be here, as do you.” The woman’s eyes flash down to her stomach, which she cradle’s protectively.

“Are you sure you’re not looking for the public _clinic_ , darling?” There’s acid in her tone. “Or perhaps you’re here searching for the father of your child. Some of the boys on this level are known to get a bit rowdy on their nights out.” She leans in, as if telling Ahsoka a secret. “In my opinion, honey, you should leave whoever that poor boy is alone. It’s not his fault you couldn’t make the responsible decision, after all.” Hot, angry tears are filling Ahsoka’s vision.

“I- I-” she starts to reply, but her throat feels tight and she can’t seem to find the words. Ahsoka takes a deep breath. Before she can reply, the woman seems to notice someone behind her.

“Oh, Hello, dear!” A wicked, self-satisfied smirk settles over the woman’s features. “I was just having a lovely discussion with this young woman about teenage mothers. They're often willing to blame anyone but themselves, I’ve found.” Ahsoka signs and bites her tongue. This isn’t the first time someone’s assumed things about her and it won’t be the last. If this woman wants to be nasty, let her. She’ll leave her be and go find Lux.

“Indeed,” replies the person behind her. Apparently she doesn’t need to. Because upon turning around, Ahsoka sees the young senator looking very, very uncomfortable. He looks at her, then averts his gaze. It’s the clinic all over again. “I had to do some, erm, research on the subject. For school.” The woman nods sagely.

“Lux.” Ahsoka says his name very quietly. A whisper. The purple woman turns to her, then back to Lux.

“Do you to know each other?” Her crone’s eyes are suspicious, her mouth pulling into a frown. The next moment seems to stretch on into eternity.

“I’m afraid not.” Those three words shatter her composure. Ahsoka blinks back her tears and swallows the lump in her throat. “Should I?” Before the crone can respond, Ahsoka gives her a pained smile.

“If you’ll excuse me, this shelf doesn’t have quite what I’m looking for.” The crone’s smile widens.

“I didn’t think it would, darling.” It’s all she can do to keep her pace normal as she walks from the library.

Step. Step. Step. Down the stairs, onto the sidewalk. 

Step. Step. Step. Try to breathe, try not to cry.

Step. Step. Step. _I’m an idiot. Why do I always choose wrong?_ Ahsoka cuts into an alleyway and curls up behind some crates. She won’t stay long. This is the kind of place where the proprietors use alleys outside of raids. Just long enough to compose herself.

“Ahsoka?” Lux’s voice calls. There’s a pang in her chest, raw and red. She wishes she could pull her feet in, but the stupid stomach won’t let her. Then fire stirs up where the pang originated from. _Why should I cry in an alley? Why should Lux get to say he looked for me and call it a day? He wants to protect his image? Fine. I’m not going to make it easy on him._

“Over here.” Her voice shakes, but she tries her best to keep it steady. Lux turns and makes as if to start down the alley, but Ahsoka walks towards him and stops in the mouth of it. He opens his mouth to speak, but she shakes her head and pushes past him. Continues her steps. When she reaches the end of the street, where she should turn, she looks back at him, allowing people to part around her. 

He’s frozen. He’s staring after her. But he’s not following.

_I should’ve listened to Obi-Wan._ One last crazy, hopeful desire to crush Lux to her chest and forgive him seizes her. Then she turns and heads for home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> N’eparavu takisit. I had to do it, though. I felt really bad for writing this. Was debating it, but this is how the plot needs to go. In other news...
> 
> I’ve decided to up the rating of this fic from ‘Teen’ to ‘Mature’ because, upon further reflection, a lot of the themes in this story qualify as adult content while not being terribly graphic. I’d like to know your thoughts on this, if you have any.
> 
> Second item of business; This story now has over 1000 reads! I’m going to do the sappy creator thing again and thank you all for the love and support you’ve shown this story. I read every comment I get and appreciate all the kudos. I didn’t know how this fic would be received originally (hence the anon publishing) but I’m glad that so many people enjoy it! Once again, sorry for any emotional distress caused by this chapter. Feel free to curse me out to your loved ones.


	11. What Falls Through the Cracks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure all of my commitments are trying to kill me. I did end up adding a new section (after the second page break), which I think ties it all together. Enjoy!

Ahsoka wakes up with someone’s face pressed into her montral. _Lux_. She smiles, her eyes still closed. Then, with a jolt, the events of their last parting rush back to her. She scrambles up, staring in horror at her bed partner. _Oh. It’s just Habee_. Not that that’s much better. _He must’ve come in late last night._ The figure on the chrono makes her wince, but something tells her she won’t be able to go back to sleep right now. 

After carefully easing her way out of bed, she makes her way out of the bedroom and shuts the door. It’s risky, but she enters the shower and checks on her second hiding place: a much more inane and less ironic decoy bottle of soap. Hopefully, Habee will be turned off enough by the scent of grass that he won’t try to use it himself. 

A pang of longing hits her hard. It’s been two weeks since she's last seen Lux, though she knows she really shouldn’t miss him. Not after the shit he pulled. Sometimes she tells herself that there must be a logical explanation, that it’s another ‘my boss is watching’ incident like the one at the clinic. But then she starts thinking about whether or not that makes _her_ an asshole, and everything just gets confusing. Ahsoka wishes she could just rewind time and not walk into that library at all.

She lies down on the couch in the living room. The longer time goes on, the less she wants to sleep next to sweaty Habee in her bed. Her mind refuses to quiet, and for a while she just lies there and tries to get some rest. But for another hour, her brain is hopelessly hung up on everything. The fact that she's due to give birth in about a month and a half, the fact that she might be giving her baby away to a group of space warriors, the fact that a devastatingly handsome senator is now absent from her after work plans. She gets so tangled up in her thoughts that she doesn't realize that Habee's followed her out until he's pressing a kiss to her montrals. Not right between them, like a certain friend of hers used to do, but right on the tips. Which is pretty bad form among Togrutas, but it's nothing short of miraculous that Habee's even awake right now.

"Hey." Ahsoka says, sitting up slowly. Habee plops down on the couch next to her, still moving sort of drunkenly.

"Hey." Another kiss, this one on the lips. Ahsoka's uncomfortable. Having spent time with someone who's actually patient enough to help her figure out what she likes, putting up with Habee's sloppy kisses is difficult. He pulls her awkwardly onto his lap, her belly and his hyperspace-addled brain combining unpleasantly. Now he bites her lekku; not lightly, but the kind of bite that barely keeps his fangs back. She pushes him away. 

"Don't do that," she admonishes, before remembering who she's dealing with. _Well, it can't hurt to let him know anyway..._ "that's too hard. Try rolling your lips over your fangs." Habee stares at her like she's grown another head.

"Are you saying I don't know how to make you feel good?" Anger is swirling under his doped-up exterior. She swallows hard. _He's not Lux._ The reminder stings, along with the knowledge that they'll never have the chance to teach each other again. She glances at the chrono on the stove.

"Habs, I've got to get ready for work." He pushes her back onto the couch and crouches between her legs. It's not comfortable, but at least he's not freaking the fuck out.

"I can be fast." _Oh, I already knew_ that.

* * *

Work is slow. Slower than slow. Slower than a Hutt on sandpaper. There's not even a Habee-free house to look forward to after work, let alone cards or Lux. Anakin asks her if she's alright a couple times, and Obi-Wan corners her in the supply closet. She blames it on the baby, or the return of Habee. They grimace and nod, buying it. At least, she hopes they're buying it. She's not sure how many more of their little interventions she can take.

Then, during a particularly slow period, she finds herself in front of the Jedi. Padmé greets her warmly, and a little warmth blooms in Ahsoka's chest. She leans in conspiratorially.

"I think Anakin's in the supply closet. If you can get past Dex I can cover for him."

"I'm starting to see why he likes you so much." The older woman responds, making her way cross the diner. Ahsoka turns back to the Jedi master, who is watching this all without commentary.

"Isn't that against your rules?" she asks, knowing the orange-skinned man isn't going to be ordering anything.

"Yes," he says, sighing, "But I cannot control her actions. My former padawan must follow her own path. And, truth be told, I do not have the heart to report her to the council." His gaze flicks up towards her. "You are troubled, young one." It's not a question, but the only other customers in the whole diner are a pair of elderly Graan who seem to be eating at the pace of the day and so she can't just disappear.

"I started-" _How the hell am I supposed to tell a fucking Jedi that I picked up with someone on the side?_ "Hanging out with a boy I met. He's from the upper levels. I thought... I thought he was my friend. But whenever we were around someone he knew, he would pretend we didn't know each other. And so we aren't speaking again, and I- I miss him." _The man is fighting a fucking war, Ahsoka. Way to make your problems seem so serious._ But something tells her that he knows more than she's said.

"Things come and go, Miss Tano." He pauses for a moment, thinking. "Obi-Wan Kenobi tells me that he spoke to you about his time with the Jedi?" _They talked? When?_ She nods. "He was with the Order for the better part of two decades. He had friends among the Jedi, and a master who was like his father. Still, his time with us came to an end. All things do. Change is, after all, a part of the Force." After he falls silent, she stands there and thinks.

"It still hurts." If his eyelids were visible, he'd probably have blinked at her.

"Would you rather be happy and hiding yourself or wistful but free? Think of it this way; if this young man truly cared for you, what other people thought wouldn't matter." The kitchen door opens, and Padmé starts approaching, red faced and smiling. Ahsoka turns back to the Kel Dor. Somehow, putting it that way seems to have clicked something on the inside of her mind.

"Thank you... Master Koon." She adds the honorific that Obi-Wan used with conscious gratitude. The Kel Dor tilts his head.

"I think that you would have made an excellent Jedi, Miss Tano." Then there's a sound that might be... a _laugh?_ "In any case, you're already more respectful than half the crèche."

It doesn't occur to her until later that the Jedi has done the impossible. He's managed to cheer her up.

* * *

Work leaves her drained and ready to go home, even if that means she has to deal with Habee. The cleaning droids are switched on, the front door locked, and Ahsoka bids a farewell to Anakin, who seems to be waiting back for Obi-Wan. He follows her into the bag area, though. For a second she’s worried that he’s going to ask her if she’s okay again, but then she notices the look on his face. She knows that look. It’s the same look he got whenever he talked about Padmé before they found out who she was. His planning look. She shoots a suspicious look at him. 

“You’re up to something.” Ahsoka says, swinging her bag around onto her back. Anakin grins, then shoots a look over his shoulder to Obi-Wan, who’s having a drawn-out conversation with Dex. 

“Obi-Wan’s birthday is in two weeks.” Ahsoka smiles now, too. “I talked to Dex earlier. We can have a party at the diner after-hours if we clean up afterwards. So... are you in?” 

“Of course!” Now she has something to look forward to. Something new. If anyone deserves an awesome birthday, it’s Obi-Wan. “I can make him a cake.” Anakin nods enthusiastically.

“I’ll see if I can contact his senator girlfriend and let her know about it. Grab a few of his other old friends I can find lying around. Hey, you can bring that Lux kid!” Her smile deflates a little at that, and this time Anakin notices. He crosses his arms and frowns. “Okay, Snips. What’s actually up? I told you before and I’ll tell you again, if he hurt you I’m kicking his ass.” Ahsoka sighs and plays with the strap on her bag nervously.

“It’s not like that.” she says, then, after the look he gives her, adds, “Okay, so it’s kind of like that. But I’m not- well, I can’t say that I’m not upset-”

“Are you going to keep dancing around it, or are you going to tell me what happened?” Ahsoka sighs again. Anakin’s not a Jedi like the Kel Dor, but he _is_ practically her brother, so she’s not really sure what to tell him. 

“Fine. We were kind of, um, fucking, and I think he really did care about me, but this one lady basically called me trash in front of him and he didn’t say anything about it and then I ran away from him. We haven’t talked in a week or so. That’s what’s been bothering me all day.” The look on Anakin’s face is unreadable. “You don’t have to beat him up. I should’ve known better and I’m probably better off witho-” He cuts her off for the second time by pulling her into a hug. Tightly. Ahsoka freezes at first, and then allows herself to melt into the hug.

It’s kind of nice, actually. Habee’s not a hugger. Lux liked to hug her, but even then it was a two way exchange. Anakin just hugs her, like he’s not expecting anything back. Like she deserves the hug. Even though it’s kind of awkward with her stomach and the fact that they’re crammed into the employee storage area. She doesn’t cry. Even though when she pulls away there are tears on her face. And a wet spot on his shirt. She’s not crying. Obviously. 

“That wasn't your fault, Ahsoka.” he says seriously, “If he’s such a big politician and has to worry about his image, then he needed to not take you out in the first place. Fuck him. Fuck that.” 

“He _was_ nice, Anakin. I did care about him. I think I still do.” She sighs. “I talked to the Kel Dor about this earlier. He told me that things always change and I need to let Lux go.” Anakin puts a hand on her shoulder.

“I like Master Koon, but he’s a Jedi. They’re not supposed to get attached to things. I still think you should let me pound this kid’s face in, but if you want to try and talk things out with him I can’t stop you. I know he made you happy...” He trails off. Ahsoka thinks for a moment. _What would I do if Lux showed up right now and apologized?_ It’s a big question. She’s got a lot of those going on right now. And answering yes would only lead to more... 

“I’ll think about it. There’s a lot going on right now.” Anakin smiles.

“That’s probably the best way to do this. I’ve got to go grab Obi-Wan now before he gets locked in a debate about who has the better sand-worm wrangling methods or something.” She hugs him, a short one, one more time before walking towards home. _How did I end up here?_ She wonders, pushing through a crowd of people. _Everything was so much easier when I just went to work and came home or played cards instead of carrying on affairs and hiding money._ As she brushes past a stiff-suited Rhodian, a new question strikes her. _Was I happy? Am I happier now?_

Just two more questions to add to the never-ending list of big ones.


	12. Not Simple to Say

The door slides shut behind her as Ahsoka slides her bag onto its hook. _I did it._ She's lasted the two and a half weeks to Obi-Wan's birthday without telling him about it. More impressively, _Anakin_ has lasted two and a half weeks without telling Obi-Wan about it. There'll be a lot to do tomorrow, and work'll be really hard to get through, but she's genuinely excited. Obi-Wan's helped her out a lot in the past and especially more recently. If anyone deserves to have a good birthday, it's him.

Habee's sitting at the kitchen table when she walks in, along with an oddly dressed stranger. He's a Togruta wearing a strange hat and sitting in the scuffed chair like it's a throne. He turns when Ahsoka walks in and flashes her a lecherous grin. It's a grin that makes her feel oily, like she needs a shower. Rings cover the length of his lekku, with two solid 'caps' resting on his montrals. Habee smiles at her from behind him.

"This is my girl, Ahsoka." he says to the stranger, adding, "Ahsoka, this is Phredd. I've been talking to him about gettin' a new job." Ahsoka folds her arms. _I don't like the look of this_. Habee turns back to Phredd, clearly dismissing her. Phredd remains fixed on her, though.

"Pleasure to meet you, Miss..."

"Tano." She can barely get the words out. Because the mark on the stranger's jacket is familiar. Words from Anakin's long ago lecture about gangs comes back to her. _You don't want to get mixed up with these kinds of people, Snips. No good for anyone._

"Ahsoka Tano. What a musical name. And your stripe patterns are exquisite... where are _you_ employed?" _Oh_ hell _no_.

"A diner over in CoCo town. I don't mean to be rude, but I should really get going." She walks past her boyfriend and the snake-like gangster, entering the bedroom and flopping down onto the bed. (As much as she can, anyways, with the current constraints on her anatomy.)

_Habee's working for a gang._ That is bad news. For everyone. The symbol on his jacket? Pyke. Spice dealers. Dangerous with a capitol D. _Oh fuck._ Even if she never goes near the gang herself, living with Habee is going to get very dangerous. Images rush through her head of knives in an alley or detonators thrown through the window. _And the baby_. She wraps her arms around her stomach protectively. They could all end up dead. And there's nothing she can-

_No._ There is. She can leave.

Her mind shuts that down as soon as it starts. _You can't leave! Habee will kill you, or his friends will, or you'll die on the streets, and no one else will ever want to touch you ever again._ But... _Won't living with a gangster be more dangerous than not living with one? What's stopping Habee from killing me right now? From killing the baby? I can stay with the guys, and I've been saving money._ She doesn't let herself stew on the last one, but thinks it anyways. _Someone wanted to do way more than touch me._ And it's scary and fear-tinged and tiny, but a little flicker of hope fills her chest. A little bit of resolve. 

_I don't know where I'm going, but I sure as hell can't stay here._ The thought of her baby growing up surrounded by spicers, trained to lie and steal and kill is enough to strengthen that resolve. The thought of a baby girl growing up, Togrutoid and female, around a crime syndicate, is enough to seal it for her. A strange twinge runs through her abdomen, not unlike the early kicks she's felt from her baby before. _Guess you don't like it either._

_I'm leaving. I don't have a choice._ And she's honestly not sure if that makes her more happy, sad, or scared.

* * *

“You’re in a good mood today.” remarks Habee, watching Ahsoka throw some things into her bag. She actually smiles at him. _Of course I’m happy. You won’t be, though._ She can’t exactly tell him that, though, so she adds onto her BS excuse.

“Since we’re doing a late cleanup I’ll make extra today. I’ve- uh, got my eye on some things for the baby. It’ll be here before we know it.” Habee smiles at that.

“Then we’ll be a real family.” He sits up on the couch. “Hey. Babe. You’re gonna be old enough real soon... whad’ya say we make it official?” _Oh no. Oh no._ The words freeze Ahsoka to the floor. Habee’s never been that interested in marriage before, so where did that come from? The baby? She doesn’t want to say yes, but she’s afraid to say no. Another of the same strange twinges runs through her. Huh. Maybe this is the Force trying to guide her? Frantically, she checks the clock.

"Shit, Habs, I've got to get going or I'm going to be late." She tries to arrange her features into a possibly seductive face. "How about I give you that answer later?" Habee grins, getting up from the couch.

"That diner can wait a minute, especially since you're staying late. I'd like that answer now." _Stars help me_. Ahsoka drops the seductive face, sidesteps her boyfriend, and moves towards the door.

"I'm not feeling it right now. I really should get going." An angry scowl crosses his face, but Ahsoka slaps the button on the door and slips out before he can say anything. There'll be hell to pay later, but she won't let that bring her down. Because she's got a cake to make.

She notices the people on her way to work in the morning. Old people, young people, odd people, inconspicuous people. Small plans growing in cracks that have accumulated enough dirt, interesting pieces of graffiti. It's going to be a good day. Not only because it's Obi-Wan's birthday, but because she's finally decided.

It's time to leave Habee. For good.

Fear still floods her when she thinks that, along with the exhilaration. The same old haunting questions. _What if he kills me, what if his buddies track me down, what if I can't find anywhere to live?_ But it's fear tinged with resolution. Because if there's one thing that she's not going to do, it's marry a fucking gangster.

As soon as she gets to the diner she seeks out Anakin in the back room. He's stacking boxes, but puts them down and shoots her a grin when she enters.

"All is a-go." he whispers, looking at the door, paranoid, "Padmé even got the message through to his girlfriend!" Ahsoka smiles.

"That's great!" _There's still time to back out, you haven't told anyone yet, you can still-_ "I- uh, have something to tell you." He gives her a guarded look. "I'm done with Habee. I haven't broken up with him yet or anything, but I'm leaving as soon as possible." For a second Anakin just kind of blinks at her, then lets out an excited whoop. This draws Obi-Wan into the room, who gives them a strange look.

"Did I miss something?" Anakin smiles at him broadly.

"Ahsoka's got some really good news." The two look at her expectantly, and she blushes, looking at the ground. Somehow, saying it out loud seems embarrassing and silly. Still, it's made Anakin happy.

"I'm leaving Habee." And the smile it brings to Obi-Wan's face is better than a hundred secret birthday parties.

* * *

The stage is set! Ahsoka, along with help from Anakin and Dex, who is apparently better friends with Obi-Wan than she would've guessed, manage to get things into shape without the man himself being any the wiser. Disposable plastic table cloths have been spread over the booths, tables reorganized so it's easier to move, and small bowls of snacks have been set out. The cleaning droids have been tucked away and Ahsoka and Anakin have changed out of their work uniforms. All that remains is for Anakin to convince Obi-Wan to come back to the diner.

Ahsoka peeks through the kitchen window at the collection of fifteen odd people milling about the room. Some of them she recognizes, like Padmé and the old delivery guy who Obi-Wan's friends with. Others are strangers who she's never seen before. She pulls her head back in and unties her apron, giving her masterpiece one last look. It's apple cake, not a usual flavor but one that several sources claim is his favorite. She's garnished the top with slices of the strange, crunchy fruit and a sugary white frosting. She gives the dining room one last look. _Who would I even talk to out there?_ Being kept at home so often has sort of crippled Ahsoka's social skills.

It's better to hide in the kitchen. Where she doesn't have to talk to anybody. The stomach twinge seemingly agrees with her, slightly sharper and more persistent.

"You _can_ come out from back there, you know. We don't bite." The voice makes her jump. Standing a few feet away at the door of the kitchen is a woman with some incredible posture and very blonde hair. Ahsoka's lekku curl a little, but she hesitantly takes a step towards the woman. Her accent is very refined, but not quite Coruscanti.

"Are you sure about that?" Ahsoka asks, stopping a few feet away from the woman. She waves a hand in the air.

"I don't bite, at the very least. Come, come. They should be here any minute." The woman walks off towards one of the booths and takes a seat. Somewhat unnerved, Ahsoka sits down across from her. "You must be Ahsoka. Obi-Wan is quite fond of you, you know." _Wait a minute..._ this woman can't be Obi-Wan's duchess girlfriend, can it? She's wearing a jacket that the good kind of smuggler would look at home in and a pair of weirdly cut black pants.

"I don't mean to be rude, but I have no idea who you are." The woman smiles slightly.

"Satine Kryze, of course. I'm sure he's talked about me before." Ahsoka blinks in surprise.

"He has, it's just..."

"I'm not what you've expected?" she guesses, "Well, it's not wise to wander around the lower levels dressed up like a duchess, nor is it at all practical. Besides, I don't get invited to non-political functions very often. Stiff dresses are pretty, but not at all comfortable." Ahsoka nods. 

"I can see why Obi-Wan likes you." she says, not knowing what else to say. It's true; Obi-Wan's always liked long, drawn-out debates. This woman could probably talk circles around the best of them. "You're very... verbose." _I hope that word means what I think it means._ Another half-smile.

"Hmm, he didn't mention you were clever, too." Ahsoka's lekku curl a little more.

"I'm not all that clever." Satine's blue eyes fix upon her, and she's got the uncomfortable feeling that this woman can read minds.

"Never sell yourself short, Ahsoka. That's the most important lesson you can learn as a politician." Ahsoka tries for a smile.

"Am I a politician now?" The woman's eyes soften a little.

"Everyone is a politician sooner or later." Any further conversation is interrupted by the opening of the door. The blonde woman _really_ smiles, now. "Unless you're him, of course," she says, gesturing to the shocked-looking Obi-Wan and shaking her head, "he was never really brave enough for politics, poor dear."

The party is a great success. Despite the exhaustion from her increasingly unwelcome and energy consuming tenant, Ahsoka manages to hold herself upright for the majority of the function. She meets another friend of Obi-Wan's, a man named Rael who embraces the red-haired man like a brother. He's dressed like the worst kind of smuggler, and when he shakes Ahsoka's hand it's with a rather dirty and firm grip. If Anakin hadn't whispered that he was _another_ Jedi, she would never have guessed it. A rather short and indignant smuggler claims to be an old friend, one who ferried Obi-Wan on one last trip to Coruscant. According to the stories she's been hearing, he was some sort of spacer before settling down to bring Anakin up properly and get a job with Dex. Weird.

At last, Anakin walks up to her, Padmé in tow, interrupting her second conversation of the evening with Satine. The woman's hardly left Obi-Wan alone all evening, but considering he's been pulled away by the currents of the party, she's engaged Ahsoka in a conversation about politics. Ahsoka's not exactly the wisest on this subject, especially since she had a very awkward falling out with her last news source. The duchess doesn't seem to mind that. They're deep into a debate about neutrality (well, more of a _lesson_ about neutrality) when it's time to go get the cake.

Ahsoka, careful to not spill cake on her singular nice dress (that fortunately gathers right below her breasts), holds the confection out in front of her. It kind of feels like she's carrying two, very precarious objects instead of one. The twinge fills her again, strangely similar to a period cramp. She frowns. _Hang in there, little one. Only another week or two and you'll be safely out of there._ If the baby doesn't make it at this point... She banishes the thought from her mind and slips out of the kitchen door, about to tap out and pass the cake off to Anakin when the door slams open. Slamming a sliding door open is difficult, but Habee is definitely the type who can manage. The twisted look on his face makes her stomach lurch with dread.

_This isn't supposed to happen,_ she protests mentally, _we had a plan! I'm laying low until next week. Habee's not supposed to be here._ He's upon her in moments, his lekku twitching with rage. Ahsoka takes a step back, and he slaps the cake out of her hands and sends it to the floor where it smashes into lumps of crumbs, the metal serving dish clattering loudly. The already cordial gathering goes silent.

"What the hell do you think you're doing here?" Habee hisses through clenched teeth. His hand grabs her wrist. Hard. Tears well up in her eyes, for the cake, for ruining Obi-Wan's birthday, for making Habee mad. And then anger runs through her. Anger that she can't have even _this,_ one night that's not about him.

"Throwing my friend a birthday party." Her voice shakes, but not with fear. "I don't remember inviting you." He yanks on her arm, hard, pulling her towards the door.

"We'll talk about this once we get home." Ahsoka wrenches her arm out of his grip, nearly overbalancing and toppling over.

"I'm not going home! Not with you, anyway." Most of the partygoers still seem shocked, but out of the corner of her eye she can see a familiar face travelling over. _Anakin._ She crosses her arms and sets her face. "Go away."

"You don't tell me what to do!" Habee insists, pulling her towards the door again. Ahsoka really _does_ trip this time, falling towards her boyfriend and yanking him downwards. He curses and lets her go. "Get up." Then an unfamiliar sound reaches her hearing, quickly followed by another. She turns around to look. The two Jedi in attendance have drawn lightsabers, and Anakin is currently standing behind her.

"You're done." he growls, and Ahsoka can tell he's ready to make good on that ass-kicking promise. He doesn't have to. After shooting Ahsoka one last angry look, he exits the diner and stalks off into the night. Anakin reaches down and helps her up. "You okay, Snips?" She takes a deep breath in, then exhales.

"Yeah, I'm fine." A strong twinge, low in her gut and full of painful promise. Finally, she recognizes it for what it is. "On second thought..." she glances up at Obi-Wan, who looks shocked and angry but not at her. _Hope you don't mind sharing a birthday._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, boys! I hope you enjoyed it. I’m posting this now, and the epilogue later in the day... a cliffhanger for you fine gentle-readers.


	13. Epilogue: Into Focus

"She's beautiful." It's the first words either of them have spoken since Ahsoka sat down across from him two minutes ago. She glances down at her daughter who observes it all with a somewhat happy expression and bright blue eyes. The small bumps that disrupt the topography of her head are beginning to get more, well, bumpy. The tiny girl looks across the table at the young man seated there and lets off a short stream of baby-babble. _Well, if she can do it..._ Ahsoka follows her daughter's gaze and catches her first up-close glimpse of Lux Bonteri in a month shy of half a year.

He's still beautiful; even more so now that he's let his hair grow out a little. He sits a little more comfortably in his seat, fits in his common clothes a little better. What outshines all of that is the look on his face as he smiles at her daughter. And then his eyes dart up, and meet hers and hold steady. She doesn't blush and look away, and neither does he. Onderon's been hit hard, she's heard. Trying to keep your head out of war news is pretty difficult when you're studying up towards becoming a politician's aide. And getting away from Habee and becoming a mother, well... they've both grown up quite a bit.

"You don't meet a lot of humans who'll say that." She glances back down at the little one, who wraps a hand around one of Ahsoka's fingers. "Baby Togrutas aren't exactly the most graceful creatures. Growing into the lekku takes a lot of time." The finger is now being commandeered and shaken around a little.

"She's beautiful in an awkward sort of way." Ahsoka smiles at that and disentangles the tiny hand, switching her baby to the other side. Then she sighs.

"Hello, Lux." He smiles at her again. _Stars, I forgot how beautiful that smile is_.

"Hello, Ahsoka." The baby squirms and gurgles. "Oh, and you too little one. I'm afraid I don't know your name." More babble. "I see. Is that so?" Lux looks back up to the baby's mother. "Her etiquette is terrible. Everyone knows that you don't just introduce yourself to people." Ahsoka lets out a light laugh.

"I'm not sure how to introduce her. The custom's to stick to nicknames until you think of a really good one. I haven’t decided between Loud-Mouth and Hungry." She falls silent, and Lux doesn't pick up the conversation. _What am I supposed to say?_ "I wish we'd talked sooner." He nods and sighs, eyes flicking down to the table and then back up to her face.

"I don't blame you for staying away." He pauses, then adds, "What I did in that library... it was wrong. For a while I convinced myself it wasn't, and then I convinced myself it didn't matter, and then I realize that it did. It mattered more than that old windbag's opinion of me, anyway. I was an asshole, Ahsoka, and I understand if you can't quite forgive me for that." Loud-Mouth chews on Ahsoka's finger now, prompting her to pull a faded cloth doll from her bag to pass to her baby.

"I've had bigger things to think about." She shifts Loud-Mouth around a little. "Loudie over here, obviously, and some classes. Work. We've got an apartment now." A shadow flickers in Lux's eyes.

"Your boyfriend?" Ahsoka smiles widely.

"Ex-boyfriend." And Lux smiles, too. She lets herself bask in the moment, staring out across the forum. Her world was entirely insular for so long, she never noticed things like the vendor who gives half-melted ice-chips out for quarter credits. Or the family sitting across the aisle, one of the children gesturing wildly with a fork. Even a pair of teenagers sitting close to the wall, absorbed in their own conversation. _That was me, a couple of months ago._ The thought almost makes her laugh. All good things must come to an end, though, even victorious smiles. "Why are we here, Lux?" The grin fades from his face, replaced with a measured thoughtfulness.

"That's a good question. For old times sake, maybe? Closure?" He shrugs. "I've been- well, you crossed my mind a couple of times. Or maybe a lot over the last couple months. Knowing that you're safe, and that Loud-Mouth over there made it out okay..." He sighs. "I've given countless speeches to disheartened rebels and various political bodies over the past few months, yet you're the only one who manages to make me stumble over my words." Ahsoka smiles.

"Are you flirting with me again, Mr. We Don't Fit?" Lux laughs, shaking his head.

"Not one of my better lines. I wouldn't dream of flirting with you, anyway. You're clearly out of my league."

"That's never stopped you before. Actually, I think we had a similar conversation about this subject at my kitchen table." There's the blush.

"I guess we were right, then. You're safe and happy, I'm safe and happy, Loudie is safe and happy. Happy ending?" Ahsoka sighs and looks down at the adorable (to her, at least), little Togruta on her lap. The doll is currently being tossed about and gnawed on at regular intervals, accompanied by bouts of babbling. "Oh. Not that simple?" Ahsoka's lekku twitch a little, attracting Loud-Mouth's attention. She runs a comforting hand over the uneven planes of her daughter's head. The love that fills her chest sometimes is so strong it frightens her. But...

"The Jedi have spoken to me about her." Ahsoka says, not looking up. "I'm doing the best I can, but I'm stretched pretty thin. I've got to work for rent, classes, everything Loudie needs, and someone to watch her. Then I'm going to the classes so I can get a basic-ed diploma, Obi-Wan's girlfriend's offered me a job as her aide, and I've just hit a montral growth spurt spurred on by mom hormones and it's giving me headaches. Loudie becoming a Jedi would be a great honor and all that, but if I'm honest she'd probably be better off anywhere but with me." _There. I said it._ And good stars does it feel nice to get all that out there to someone else.

Lux doesn't say anything, and that makes her even more afraid to look up because once she gets going with that it's hard to stop. Then she feels a soft pressure on her shoulder. Lux's hand. Without thinking she brings her own up to grab it, the sort of gesture she would've made back when they were... whatever that was. And then she realizes what she's doing and stops, lekku curling.

"Sorry. I... old habits die hard, I guess." Lux pulls his hand back and remains silent. _And now you've gone and upset him. So much for closure._ And then he looks up.

"I'm not saying your situation is ideal," he says, "but Loudie wold not be better off anywhere else. You're strong and daring and all of the other generic stuff, but, most importantly, you care about her. No matter what you do, she has that much." Ahsoka lifts the little devil up so she can look her in the eyes. Eyes that match her own, or so she's been told.

"We can't just be friends again. That didn't end well the first two times we tried it." It's not a direct response to what he's said, but it's probably why they're having the conversation in the first place. "And I don't know if I'm ready to be with someone again." Lux sighs.

"So this is goodbye, then?" Ahsoka looks him square in the eyes.

"I don't know. Everything got a lot more confusing when I started to try making good decisions. Answer me this, though: if I started hanging out with you again, would it be the right thing to do? Could you stand up to the old windbags out in public? Were we even really happy all those months ago?" She puts Loudie back on her lap. "I still feel something for you. But I have a lot I need to figure out on my own."

"So it's goodbye... for now." Ahsoka shrugs and stands up, shifting the still-burbling Loudie.

"Maybe. I- I don’t know. If I do become Satine's assistant, we'll probably end up seeing each other. So I guess it _is_ goodbye for now." Lux takes a step towards her, then halts, shoving his hands in his pockets. She gives him a curious look.

"Well, I was going to hug you or shake your hand or _something_ , but I'm not really sure what to do." She smiles at him.

"I'll pick." Her kiss is light and on his cheek. _I hope I do end up seeing him._ The expression on his face is unreadable, and then he turns to walk away. "Lux," she calls, and he turns, confused and hopeful, "thank you. For everything." And the smile on his face is so genuine it's all she can do to not run after him and kiss him again. 

"Little one," she says later, walking along the sidewalk, "I think I owe you a thank you as well. After all, you started all of it." Conflicting thoughts run through her, Lux and job offers and Jedi. Ahsoka lifts the little one up to her face again, prompting more delighted burbles. "I'll talk to the boys again. Maybe they'll be able to help me figure it all out. But you'll be my little Hungry Loud-Mouth no matter what, right?" Another burble settles it. Ahsoka smiles, lowers the little one back down to a safe walking level, and heads for home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... that was It’s Com-Pie-Licated. I really, really hope you liked it and I want to thank you all for the kudos, comments, bookmarks, and hits. Figures that the story I publish Anon becomes my most popular one, eh?
> 
>  ~~I’m toying around with the idea of another musical based AU, because Jedi!Padmé did not get to do nearly enough in this fic. I’m going to take some time off before I go for that, though. (Since we’ve already established that I’m an impatient yet procrastinating fool, it’ll probably be coming out sometime next week.) [I’m joking. Mostly...]~~ It’s here, folks. ‘Becoming Solid Teflon’, a Heathers/Star Wars crossover.
> 
> Let me iterate that I love all the support and I’m glad that you chose to spend your time reading through this story! I’d like to suggest that those of you just here for Star Wars check out Waitress if you’re into the whole musical thing, and those of you who are inexplicably here for just Waitress who have gotten this far check out Star Wars. Right, I think that’s all. You’ve been lovely, ladies and gents and others, have a good day! *cue credits*

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Becoming Solid Teflon](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27564571) by Anonymous 




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